Faith Venture

The Gentle Art of Asking Part Two

May 2, 2023

Quite by accident the second edition of “Humble Inquiry: The Gentle Art of Asking Instead of Telling,” by Edgar H. Schein and Peter A. Schein appeared in my mail the other day. Reviewing some older notes, I saw the recommendation. When this book arrived, I discovered I had the first edition on my bookshelf. The second edition was worth the refresher.

Do you know any long-time elementary school teachers? Ever listen to them? Do their questions sound often like a prosecuting attorney going after a criminal suspect?

Do we catch ourselves asking questions to test other people? Or questions where we wish to discover if they are for us or against us? Questions meant to trap us—like often were posed to Jesus?

The gentle art of asking questions instead of telling people reveals true curiosity. We want to know what someone else is thinking—really.

The gentle art draws people in rather than establishing a barrier between people. Its foundation includes trust, sincerity, mindfulness. I would add intention.

So often we ask, but then we fail to listen to the answer. Listening, that is, that involves our complete attention.

I wrote about this book five years ago. It’s one of those books that requires a reread periodically. It’s brief. Readable. New insights will pop out each reading.

Posted in Attention, Attitude, Humility, Listening | Leave a Comment »

Simplify

May 1, 2023

Simplicity—we are approaching travel season. How do you travel?

When Jesus sent his followers out on a training mission, he told them to take nothing with them.

Thanks to laptop and digital files, anti-microbial marino wool T-shirts, water-(and red wine) shedding slacks, I’ve learned to take a 3-4 day business trip with only a backpack. I can do a week’s vacation to most places that way. The reduced load on my mind (and my back) by learning to get by with less is freeing.

This, of course, is a metaphor for living a simpler life in general. What can you reduce, throw out, unclutter? How much emotional crap are you carrying that should be disposed of? How many physical objects are getting in your way?

Posted in Disciplines, simplicity | Leave a Comment »

Beware the Complainer

April 28, 2023

People at work or at church or wherever gathered in clusters to listen to someone complain about something—leadership, finances, systems. The complaining fed on itself and the impromptu gathering could destroy attitudes for hours.

Social media has amplified the circle you can reach with your complaints, criticisms, unfounded and not-thought-out opinions. You have no responsibility to fix anything. No responsibility for the effect your words have on others.

Beware those who constantly criticize. Don’t join their little clusters at work or wherever you are. Mute them on social media so that you don’t see their rants.

Associate with those people who lift you up. Or associate with those whom you can serve.

Clear your mind. Take the road of positivity. Take the road of service. Most of all take responsibility. Life is much better that way.

Posted in Attitude, Disciplines | Leave a Comment »

We Are Human

April 27, 2023

“We are human.”

The podcast conversation on Guy Kawasaki’s Remarkable People with David Ambroz evoked horror, sadness, hope, even joy.

Ambroz released a book A Place Called Home: A Memoir. This Amazon executive with a degree from Vassar and a law degree from UCLA tells a moving story of growing up homeless with two siblings and a mentally ill mother. Foster care only led to abuse. But his mother managed to instill a few values and some good fortune and hard work propelled him out of the cycle into a successful life.

“How should we look at homeless people?,” Kawasaki asked. “They are human,” Ambroz replied.

I have thought of a similar response every time I hear statements denigrating women, gay people, people of different ethnicities or colors. We are human. All of us.

Think of the way Jesus related to Romans, Syrians, Samaritans, women, political extremists, people with extreme skin illnesses. He touched lepers. He healed Romans and Syrians. He talked frankly with a Samaritan woman.

Can we do any less?

We are human. Compassion–what a wonderful thing.

Posted in Attitude, Compassion | Leave a Comment »

The Black Magic Marker

April 26, 2023

Once upon a time there was a guy who, when faced with difficult passages in letters from the Apostle Paul, would say, “Get out your black magic marker and cover over this passage.”

He was joking, of course. As a sort of fundamentalist, he wouldn’t advocate modifying scripture. But he was serious in the sense we all are when we read something in biblical writing with which we disagree. Rather than say “I don’t know” like I mentioned yesterday, we choose to ignore it. Treat it as if it were non-existent.

At university and for many years following, I disliked the writings of Paul. He was anti-female, anti-gay, anti-sex. He was used by Christian preachers in southern US from before the Revolution to justify slavery. At a time when many of us were upset with the promoted racism and war of our government, he had written Romans 13 about supporting your government (something today’s American fundamentalists also ignore).

One day I said to myself, I don’t know. I took a deep dive into scholarship around his letters gaining some respect and insight into his thought.

It is OK to disagree. Even among ourselves. If we use that as a starting point for “I don’t know” and open ourselves up to deeper revelations.

I’ll leave you with this thought.

We are probably all familiar with the Shema, the Hebrew prayer from Deuteronomy 6:4. Jesus quotes it a couple of times—the part about you shall love the lord your God… NT Wright’s study of Paul pointed out what he calls Paul’s Shema. Meditating on this has led to new insights for me:

One God, the Father, from whom all things, and we (belong) to him.

And one Lord, Jesus Messiah, through whom all things, and we (live) through him.
1 Cor 8:6

Posted in Disciplines, Study | Leave a Comment »

I Don’t Know

April 25, 2023

A scientist begins with “I don’t know.” Curiosity ensues. Questions. A need to know and discover.

What about studying theology—or trying to discover God?

I approached all of university, as well as all my studies since, as an answer to “I don’t know, but I am curious to learn.”

I wonder how many people approach the study of theology begin with I don’t know and seek to discover or how many begin with a priori “knowledge” and seek only to prove what they already believe to be true?

Not everyone is like me most likely. Missing out on the joy of discovery. The joy of finding God in unexpected places. And the joy of changing my mind if God shows me a better explanation or path.

University and business writing taught me to express myself with certainty. Some people have said to me that I sound like I know the material. In reality, I’m throwing out ideas. If someone throws back another idea, I’ll consider it. Maybe I’ll learn something new and wonderful.

Sometimes it’s like that man who exclaimed to Jesus, “I believe. Help me in my unbelief!”

We could do with a little less certainty in our societies and a little more joy of discovering something we didn’t know.

Posted in Attitude, Learning | 2 Comments »

Living Mindlessly

April 24, 2023

Have you ever been in the shower and suddenly wonder whether you’ve done the shampoo part or not?

Has it happened more than once?

With me, it happens often. My mind is far away from what I’m doing.

I guess I’ve always been that way. We were married in June and were temporarily living in my small home village. I was a total social nerd. One of my exceptionally nice aunts pulled my wife aside for tea or something females do. I guess my aunt told my unsuspecting bride that I wasn’t always aware of people around. “I believe he’s always thinking about something.” She was perceptive. Even as a teen, my mind was lost in the world of ideas.

How many times have we been around others and unaware of the signals they are sending? How many thoughtless things have we said without thinking? Our mind was in ourselves not them?

This morning, these thoughts came to me as I brewed coffee. But I was aware also of the coffee in the early morning. And now my chair and the laptop perched on my thighs and the early spring scene outside my window with the robins hunting and the mourning doves calling. It’s been a long process to live mindfully, to concentrate on the minute and the experience at hand, to act intentionally. In a paradox, it slows me in order to speed me.

Posted in Attitude, Intention | Leave a Comment »

Practicing The Gospel of Welcome

April 21, 2023

The gospel of welcome. What does it mean? It means the good news is good news for everybody. It’s a blanket, all-inclusive invitation. There isn’t anyone to whom it doesn’t apply. You don’t have to qualify for the gospel. You don’t have to get cleaned up first. There isn’t a particular sin that will make someone shut the door on you. If you’ve been rejected elsewhere, you won’t be rejected here.

This is today’s essay on The Catch by John Fischer. I probably sang some of his songs way back in the late 60s and early 70s when I learned some early Jesus movement music—mostly from my experience teaching in a Catholic school. Those were honest songs about finding a relationship with Jesus.

We hear so much gospel of unwelcome in mass media and social media. Leave that behind. Practice The Gospel of Welcome. Don’t divide humans into us and sinners. God decided, Jesus decided, welcome all who will come. There are no sinners v non-sinners. All are sinners.

Posted in Disciplines | Leave a Comment »

Lord, Teach Us To Pray

April 20, 2023

Monday’s post looked at how many people want to know things about prayer, but they do not want to learn and practice prayer itself.

My wife was raised in an independent Baptist church. She was taught that all prayers must come directly from the heart. She was disturbed when a pastor had written a prayer and read it as part of a service. It couldn’t have come from the heart because he read it. But, I would ask, wasn’t it in his heart when he wrote it (Baptist, had to be a “he”)?

Similarly, she was trained to be derisive about “reciting” the Lord’s Prayer (the Our Father). If you are merely reciting words written 2,000 years ago, it obviously isn’t from your heart.

I would say that “praying” the Lord’s Prayer gave a structure to a prayer. It reminds me (us) of the different things we should be weighing on our heart.

Oh, yes, there is someone I need to forgive.
Oh, yes, I can pray for something I need today.
Oh, yes, I can ask for protection from something bad that may happen to me or others.
I need to remember to acknowledge God as the power in my life as in others.

This Renovaré podcast conversation with Nate Foster (Richard J. Foster’s son) and Monica and Jeremy Chambers about how they pray the Lord’s Prayer inspired me to go deeper into using this short and simple, yet deep and comprehensive, prayer template in my own daily meditations.

Here is a version translated by the ever thoughtful Dallas Willard:

Dear Father, Always near us,

May your name be treasured and loved,

May your will be done on earth in just the way it is done in heaven.

Give us today the things we need today,

And forgive us our sins and impositions on you

As we are forgiving all who in any way offend us.

Please don’t put us through trials,

But deliver us from everything bad.

Because you are in charge,

And you have all the power,

And the glory too is all yours—forever—

Which is just the way we want it!
Dallas Willard

Posted in Disciplines, Prayer | Leave a Comment »

Getting A Heart Checkup

April 19, 2023

I visited with my cardiologist the other day. They checked a number of aspects of my heart’s health. Then they sent a thorough report that came through my app. Excellent results. It’s nice when you can go to a doctor and chat about vacations to Iceland rather than your imminent demise.

The experience caused me to wonder about my latest heart check up from my spiritual cardiologist—Jesus.

There has not been an app update from the kingdom of God about the status of my heart. However, nudges come to me when I sit in quiet and pay attention. Sometimes the nudges are more like getting hit by a 2×4 piece of wood.

Rather than open my app, I need to open my spiritual eyes and awareness listening to what God is telling me—either reproof or excellent checkup. And I can adjust my way accordingly.

I maintain heart health through diet and exercise and stillness (meditation). I maintain my spiritual heart health through study, meditation, prayer, service, worship. Notice a blend of stillness and action. Kind of like that old Motown Marvin Gaye and Kim Weston hit—It Takes Two. Let your meditations and prayers form the foundation of your active life.