What the World Needs Now

October 30, 2023

What the world needs now 

Is love, sweet love 

It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of 

What the world needs now 

Is love, sweet love 

No, not just for some, but for everyone

Hal David and Burt Bacharach

Our business culture consists of a drive for continual and exponential growth. This attitude bleeds over to every organization. Think mega-churches. Every small church pastor dreams of building the next mega-church.

What did these organizations breed? Rock star leaders with egos growing to the size of the solar system. Preachers telling you how to behave while forcing assistants to watch pornographic movies with them. CEOs more interested in manipulating financial numbers in order to drive up stock prices so that their gifts of stock from the corporation will be worth billions. 

Think on this from David W. Orr, professor of Environmental Studies at Oberlin College:

“The plain fact is that the planet does not need more successful people. But it does desperately need more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers, and lovers of every kind. It needs people who live well in their places. It needs people of moral courage willing to join the fight to make the world habitable and humane. And these qualities have little to do with success as we have defined it.” From Ecological Literacy: Educating Our Children for a Sustainable World.

We don’t need another Willow Creek or Saddleback. We need people who will get up in the morning and treat the family well. They’ll leave the house and bring peace and healing to those they meet. Treat the planet with kindness. Spread joy.

Church Growth? What Is The Real Goal?

October 27, 2023

Today is more of a meditative essay than short contemplative thought.

Many years ago I was involved in leadership in a church. The fad of the day was the Church Growth movement. Oh, yes, that continues even now 40+ years later. But I went off to church growth classes and seminars. Our small church probably had about 100 weekly attendance. We learned about building a building along the major highway or freeway. The building should be in the middle of a gigantic parking lot. There should be no traditional religious icons or art. The music should be contemporary. The speaker enthusiastic.

The goal copied from business (and actually borrowed from 19th Century Social Darwinism) focused on growth—growth in numbers of weekly attendees and growth in revenue.

I’m not sure anyone stopped to think about the real goal of a New Testament church. Oh, Bill Hybels at Willow Creek, the prototype of the genre, talked about an Acts 2 church. Trust me, they didn’t achieve that goal. Much good was undoubtedly achieved. But I wondered until I experienced it first hand. 

This week the Plough Daily thought drew from an essay by Charles E Cotherman (the link gives you  one of an allowed three page views, I believe). He said, in part (the entire essay is worth reading):

The drive for efficiency within local churches became more pervasive over time. In post-war America, it was often led by a revolving group of church growth consultants and expert communicators who built large ministries through the systematic appropriation of business techniques and large media platforms. But as local churches looked to top-selling Christian authors, famous television preachers, and well-known worship leaders, what they witnessed was a new kind of efficiency that rewarded those who had won the competition for market share. No wonder the temptation toward church consolidation and mega churches has been so compelling. Like Walmart, these larger churches have harnessed the power of efficiency to great effect.

Cotherman was concerned with small rural churches that at one point were considered “inefficient” (whatever that means). He noted, “What small rural churches can offer, however, is an opportunity to be truly known within the church and the larger community.”

My point evolves from that thought. What is the goal of the church? Is it really more about relationship? About people living the kind of life in the spirit (like in Acts 2) that other people are attracted? Is the goal number? Efficiency? Or better, isn’t it more about making the Good News  come alive within the lives of real people?

How?

Marketing guru Seth Godin wrote today about “Small groups, well organized.” He noted challenges for anyone seeking to make an impact.

  • First, we get distracted by the inclination to make the group as big as we can imagine. After all, the change is essential, the idea is a good one. It’s for everyone. Except that’s a trap. Because a group that’s too large cannot be coherent or organized. 
  • Or perhaps, we blink and settle for a group that’s too small. Change requires tension, and if our group is so small that it’s comfortable at all times, we are probably avoiding making an impact. 
  • And well organized? That’s the persistent, generous work of creating the conditions for deep connection. 

When in doubt, focus on how to organize the folks you already have. Find a way to give them the tools for them to tell the others. Build a resilient loop, one that gets more organized and powerful as you grow. The right-sized group and ceaseless peer-to-peer organization are the foundation of culture change.

I applaud the phrase right-sized. Remember the goal. Is it only numbers? Or is it lives worth living?

I am “thinking out loud.” What do you think? I encourage thought–whether or not you comment.

Get Out of Your Own Way

October 26, 2023

“Getting Things Done,” by David Allen swept through the ranks of knowledge workers twenty-some years ago. I actually have four of his books staring at me from my bookshelf. GTD, practitioners were called “GTD-ers”. 

People thought they would increase productivity exponentially (for the math challenged, that means by a lot).

They missed some of the points. The most important perhaps was clearing your mind. You need to cultivate a “mind like water,” that is, a mind that restores itself to tranquility soon after a random agitation. It’s what happens when you throw a pebble into a still pond.

You clear your mind by capturing your thoughts in a trusted place. This habit clears your mind—it no longer needs to keep it in random access memory.

Similarly, I just listened to executive coach and author Jerry Colonna talk about writing on his latest book during his annual two-month sabbatical (yes, he has taken a sabbatical that long for 20 years). He talked about productivity influencers instructing us to write 1,000 words/day. He was frustrated. Stressed. Then thought—I’m putting this stress on myself. Why don’t I get out of the way? Don’t stress. Get up. Write some. Go out and hike in the wilderness.

Maybe we have committee work. Or deadlines. Or wallboard repairs in the garage (oops, that’s mine).

Maybe we quit stressing about it. Write what needs to be done. Tackle these items serially. Don’t stress. When there’s an opportune time, work on it.

Cal Newport, author and computer science professor who wrote Deep Work, calls this slow productivity. I say develop workflows and just plug away at things without stressing over them.

Get out of your own way. Do what’s important. Rinse and repeat.

Excessively Gentle With Ourselves

October 25, 2023

Do you talk to yourself? What do you say? I will walk to a place and back and forget to pick up what I was looking for. I’ll say, “You dummy!”  That seems to be my favorite phrase.

Is yours worse than that? Do you say it too often?

The Irish poet John O’Donohue wrote a line found in his book, To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings,

Be excessively gentle with yourself.

Treating ourselves gently helps us develop the habit of gentleness. We can expand that to the way we approach others. Gently.

I Am So, So, Sorry

October 24, 2023

My wife and I just finished a six-episode English crime drama. The story can be told in summary like this:

  • People (many) take unwise actions
  • Everyone had guilt
  • Many were so, so sorry
  • Except maybe not everyone was really that sorry
  • Many were liars
  • At the end the star witness said he had lied, except he always lied throughout the show, was he lying when he said he lied?
  • Action, guilt, sorry, rinse and repeat

Life confronts us like this. 

Either we do something foolish or even criminal. We are hit by guilt. We think we can remedy the situation by expressing how we are so, so, sorry.

Except that words often seem short of sincerity. As if they are patching over the flaws. (Sine Cera—Latin, without wax, eg statue without wax covering over flaws in workmanship.)

Someone lies to us. Now, the conundrum. Do we ever trust that that person is not lying when they say something? Maybe. Maybe, not.

Saying I’m so, so, sorry really just begins the journey. It now takes time and actions to establish trust in the truth of those words.

Why Hate?

October 23, 2023

I read the blog of a technology innovator. He is Jewish, but non-religious, from New York City.

That always reminds me of a sales rep I had in NYC in the 1980s. When I met her, she said hi, I’m a typical New York Jew. I said, great, I have no idea what that means. She also thought that since I was from Ohio that I was a hayseed farmer. After we went to work making sales calls, we just became the marketer and salesperson trying to make a living.

Back to the tech blogger. He recently asked on his blog, “Why do people hate Jews?”

I have thought about that often during the past week since he posted it in light of the fighting going on right now.

I have no answers from psychology or analysis.

I have no answers to other questions of why one group chooses to hate another. It’s happening all around the world. It’s happening in your neighborhood.

An answer easy to say and evidently impossible to live comes from a teaching by Jesus—Love your enemies.

Maybe, just maybe, we could go out today and show kindness, kindness from the heart, to a person of a different tribe or ethnic identity or sexual identity? Do it twice and it may become a practice—a true spiritual practice.

Be Just a Little Kinder Than Necessary

October 23, 2023

Among my favorite podcasts is Huberman Lab from Professor Andrew Huberman, PhD, professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology at Stanford School of Medicine. Despite this impressive resume, he takes deep dives into topics and conducts interviews in a manner approachable to all of us.

The last episode featured Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett discussing “How to Understand Emotions.” She discusses her research over her career explaining what emotions are and how the brain represents and integrates signals from our body and the environment around us to create our unique emotional states. 

From the show notes, “We also discuss actionable tools for how to regulate feelings of uncertainty and tools to better understand the emotional states of others.”

They come together on some practical disciplines that I teach wherever I can:

  • Eat Real food
  • Get Good Sleep
  • Exercise

They conclude with two more essential ingredients for a good life that seem to be in short supply these days. Perhaps we can work these into our daily life practices.

  • Trust
  • Kindness

Another excellent podcaster, Tim Ferriss,, has begun concluding his podcast interviews with this phrase:

Be just a little kinder than necessary today.

Excellent advice for life.

The Power of Keeping Your Mouth Shut

October 19, 2023

Dan Lyons, technology reporter, came to awareness of a glaring fault while sitting alone in an apartment while his wife and children were still living at home.

His problem—he talked too much. When he got started, his kids would talk about “Danalogues.” The problem is so prevalent in our society that it has a name—“overtalking.”

Some people never stop. My mother-in-law was a sweet lady, but she never met a silence that shouldn’t be filled. Maybe you know people like that. Even worse are those in such a rush to talk that they constantly interrupt and talk over others. Now we’ve gone from gently amusing to greatly annoying. If any of this resembles you, you may be a “talkaholic.” In that case, this book is for you.

His book is Stfu: The Power of Keeping Your Mouth Shut in an Endlessly Noisy World. There is a little analysis tool in the beginning that will help you discern your talkativeness.

“Speaking with intention,” he says in the introduction, “that is, not just blurting things out, improves our relationships, makes us better parents, and can boost our psychological and even physical well-being.”

Lyons not only describes the malady in graphic detail, he also offers five tips to STFU

  1. When possible, say nothing.
  2. Master the power of the pause.
  3. Quit social media.
  4. Seek out silence.
  5. Learn how to listen.

If you read nothing else in the book, do the first chapter on the problem and the last chapter on listening. Most people hear noise, but most people don’t really listen.

I can enter a room and quietly listen and observe and be happy. But if someone asks me a question, I’m capable of a half-hour exposition on the topic. I needed the book! I once taped a small note to the top of my notebook that said only STFU. (That means shut up, if you don’t get the initialism.)

Try it. You’ll like it.

Philosophy versus Theology

October 18, 2023

There was a time where I studied theology. Not at university. But I read. I subscribed to an academic journal. I thought.

But it was all dead. Just arguments over various ideas. (Maybe I’m mad that Theology Today didn’t publish one of my poems, but I doubt that. I seldom get mad.) I would get a feel for where the academic thinking was and then drop it for a while. A curiosity thing.

Philosophy, on the other had, was more life giving. Not the academic philosophy from the university. But glancing on my bookshelf and seeing Plato, Aristotle, Plotinus, Augustine, Seneca, Marcus Aurelius, Bacon, Pascal, Montaigne. They explored ideas, but they also explored how to live a fulfilled life. 

We can read the Jewish and Christian scriptures that way, too. Oh, we can read these to find a list of rules that separate us from the heathen. Or, we can read what Jesus said and did and learn about living. We can read where James warns us about how our tongue can get us into trouble. How Paul describes reciprocal relationships and how living in the Spirit gives us freedom.

Three times I read references to Thomas Aquinas. St. Thomas if you’re Catholic. Taking a hint, I pulled Summa Theologica from my shelves and began to read. It took a while to get used to that particular Latin literary style. But I wasn’t getting into it. Then came the realization, this is a book on defining terms. I could see its importance for the job he was asked to do by the Pope. But, it isn’t speaking to me. I’m not studying for a degree. Or even to impress anyone (too late for that, now). My interest lies in living a better life. (Man, am I glad again that I dropped out of that Ph.D. track I began after university. That could have been my life.)

Take a hint. Read things that fill your mind with advice for life. You’ll find every day a better place for existence. 

Keep Your Eyes On Your Own Work

October 17, 2023

For as long as there have been schools with students organized in rows and columns, there have been teachers saying, “Keep your eyes on your own work.”

Once again what we learned in kindergarten is appropriate in life as an adult.

We notice other people’s bodies or relationships or how they keep house and talk (gossip?) with others about them.

The time spent looking, thinking, talking to others is better spent paying attention to our own bodies, our own relationships, our own life. Not in a narcissistic way. In an honest evaluation of where we are and where we can improve. 

We could eat better, exercise just a little more, listen to those around (not just hear, but actively listen), pick up after ourselves.

There are times to think about other people. Not to discuss them with others. Rather to compliment, praise. Also if they are your responsibility to correct or guide. Sometimes to encourage.