Living Life Tricks

September 15, 2014

Steve Jobs was an enigma for those of us deeply immersed in technology. He was a genius who drove the Pixar movie studio to become a significant force in Hollywood. He was a genius who rescued the company he founded, Apple, from the doldrums and not only created a company with immense financial value, he brought us some great computers (I have a MacBook Pro), the iPad (which I’m using to compose and publish this post), the iPod (where I stored my music and podcast library and used when I worked out), and the iPhone (which replaced my iPod, Palm Pilot and various mobile phones).

He also was an arrogant jerk by all reports, but people who worked for him were intensely loyal.

He also left behind some ideas worth hacking into our own lives to become more productive and meaningful.

Focus

I read a story about Steve when he first returned to Apple and sat in a product review meeting. I use the story often when advising companies or people.

It seems he listened to product managers describe an extensive array of products that Apple was producing. He got up and said something to the effect of let’s cut out the crap. We’ll focus on a limited number of desktop computers and a limited number of laptops. And we’ll make these great.

And they did.

Focus is so important. We get distracted so easily into so many things. Then we accomplish little. And it is so easy to slide out of focus.

Throw the crap out of your life. Focus on the few things that are important. Children, family, the one thing that will make your work or ministry most effective. Be great at it.

Delegate

There is a story that comes from Apple, but it is a technique I used in the mid-80s when I managed project managers designing and building machines.

We would get toward the end of a project and the customer would come in and things would be floundering. I’d get up, go to the white board and draw a matrix. I’d list the tasks to be done, who was responsible, and the due date for completion. It’s said that at Apple all meeting should end with a list of tasks and a directly responsible individual.

If you are leading a team of any kind, or even within your family, practice defining tasks and delegating by putting someone in charge. Some managers think that they need to do it all. Some people think that they need to do it all. Say no and delegate to others.

Get more experiences

Jobs was a legend in the technology industry. He had a Liberal Arts background (I don’t think he completed the degree). Famously, he started just auditing a bunch of classes just for the heck of it. He took a calligraphy class. From that experience, he made the first Macintosh a much better machine and revolutionized the computer industry.

I appreciate that because I had a technology background but didn’t finish that degree. I wound up with a Liberal Arts degree and became a staunch believer in the classic Liberal Arts. Not as “soft” subjects that are an easy way to a degree like it became in the 70s.

I took a wide variety of courses that confounded my advisor. Math, extra foreign languages, writing, literature, philosophy, international politics and culture. I learned to learn, think, communicate. The basics of an educated person.

  • Take some way-out courses
  • Travel
  • Meet new people
  • Say yes to one new work experience or ministry
  • Learn another language

Someone on TV used to have “stupid dog tricks.” Try doing some smart life tricks. And it’s never too late.

Choosing The Right Advice

September 12, 2014

Fools think their own way is right; but the wise listen to advice.

I have had a very busy week with little time for reflection except in snippets. My own advice I should have listened to–as Yoda might put it. I took the last flight out of Chicago Wednesday. Delayed an hour. Arrived home Thursday morning at 1:15 am. Not conducive to getting up at 5:30 and meditating and reading.

What has been on my mind this week is puzzling out people who do not seek the facts of a situation, but proceed on rumor and innuendo. On the other hand, I’ve also run into people who go the other way and wait for all the facts to come in to make a decision.

The quote comes from Proverbs. Those who proceed to action from their feelings based on information that comes in that they feel disposed toward believing, will make bad decisions. And they will stir up divisiveness.

These people reflect what happens when a personality type tips out of balance. It’s when the “feeling/judgmental” type as described by Myers-Briggs goes to excess. This is where the wise seek out and listen to good advisors. They remind themselves that they don’t know everything and that maybe they should still learn.

The other type, meanwhile, is when the opposite, the “thinking/perceptives”, need to take in more information and more information and have trouble acting. That’s when you test your advisors, trust the proven ones and finally decide “I know enough to take action” and do so.

Philosophers have taught us from ancient times that balance is all important. We need to seek balance in our lives. We need to seek balance in our personalities. We need to study, think, act. Not act, think, study.

The Listless Leader

September 5, 2014

There are two types of dysfunctional leaders in meetings. One dominates every discussion. Pontificates about everything he knows. Makes all decisions before discussion starts.

We read in Proverbs that a wise leader seeks advice. I’ve experienced many of these leaders. They are easy to understand. They are just so full of themselves they call meetings just to have an audience. The same book of advice counsels us to hold our tongue, keep silence. That’s a good meeting strategy for a leader. Except that the leader should ask questions.

The other type is harder for me to fathom. She sits slumped in her chair. Seemingly distracted. Discussion is held. Some decisions are made. But everything is tentative. No definite direction is formed. The leader may say something. He may “wake up” long enough to make a contribution. But the meeting goes on as if the leader (or the person who holds the title of leader) offers nothing.

In the recent history of business, we’ve seen examples of leaders, perhaps trying to avoid responsibility as in the Enron debacle, who described themselves that way. Aloof. Letting subordinates do whatever they wish.

This is a path to ruin.

Is this because some leaders are like the first one who needs affirmation but who don’t have that dominating personality? They need the conversation to be all about them, but expect others to do the affirming?

This type of leader could use some of the energy of the first type. A leader who does not show energy does not show interest. A leader not interested is not doing her job. Energy breeds energy. From the energy of the leader comes energy of everyone. From lethargy of the leader comes indecision and incomplete decisions. And subordinates left to go their own way.

A good leader shows interest and energy, bringing the energy level of the entire meeting up to where everyone is involved. Then decisions are made and everyone is clear what the direction of the organization is.

Failure To Communicate

September 4, 2014

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” – George Bernard Shaw.

Ever tell your child to do something and it doesn’t happen? “Well, I thought you said…,” was the reply.

What about miscommunication with spouse or significant other? You thought you said….

I write to international audiences. In fact, this blog has readers in England, Ireland, Germany, India, China, Australia, Italy and more. Even in the English-speaking countries, there are nuances in the language that could change meaning.

I just finished a column that will be published in an Italian manufacturing magazine. Educated Europeans have been taught English. But it’s British English. I think about that when I write. Many know American colloquialisms, but I don’t want to assume that knowledge. I choose words very carefully.

The worst thing in a conversation, whether personal or in a meeting or wherever, is that you think the other person or people understood you. It is best to consider your words. It also good to ask questions to confirm understanding.

It is so easy to cause unnecessary conflict and hurt when your communication goes through a filter on the other end that changes your meaning into something else.

Above all else, strive for clarity in your communications.

Pattern Recognition for Growth and Success

September 3, 2014

Our brains are excellent at pattern recognition. Except, that is, when we’re looking at the patterns of our own lives.

The premise of Henry Cloud’s latest book, “Never Go Back”, is that successful people come to a point where they see a pattern in their lives that is not working out. When they see that pattern “they go through a door and never go back.”

Or, to state the inverse, Proverbs contains a statement, “A fool returns to his folly.”

It seems like every time I’m in some sort of transition period, Cloud releases a new book that speaks directly to my condition.

It was four years ago this week when I found myself in the hospital for the first time since I was born with a painfully torn quadriceps muscle.

That event seemed to be the start of some necessary transformations, and Cloud released “Necessary Endings” which spoke directly to the situation. I needed to find a end game and start something new.

But then I repeated a pattern by getting drawn into another dysfunctional business relationship. Andy Stanley recently talked about decision-making–if you feel a tension stop and reflect. I felt the tension, but I didn’t stop. That was a pattern repeating. It had happened several times before.

I’ve gone through that door, hopefully to never return.

Sometimes the pattern is breaking a habit–more properly stated as replacing a dysfunctional habit with a new, healthier one.

There is a spiritual pattern we can fall into where we sort of “lose” the spirit. We can leave that situation through intentional spiritual practices–reading the Bible, prayer, join a small study group.

Others we break when we realize the dysfunction and never go back.

Twisting Scripture To Fit Our Ideas

August 29, 2014

It is not a new idea–picking out phrases from Spiritual writing and twisting them to suit an individual’s point of view.

I remember reading John Calhoun and other early 19th century writers using Scripture to justify slavery and treating black people as not human. Just so, there are people still today who do the same thing regarding women. That would be Christians–not just Muslims.

But way back in the beginning of our faith, Peter writing to the churches says

So also our beloved brother Paul wrote to you according to the wisdom given him, speaking of this as he does in all his letters. There are some things in them hard to understand, which the ignorant and unstable twist to their own destruction, as they do the other scriptures.

Peter calls these people “ignorant” and “unstable.” He has been criticizing those who perverted the teachings by preaching a gospel of sexual license and straying from holiness and the teaching of Jesus.

Peter says that we should wait out the coming of the new heaven and new earth while striving to be found by God to be at peace, without spot or blemish.

Like I said yesterday, my rather superficial reading of Paul in my youth led me to conclusions that were wrong. I am blessed with a personality that enables me to change when I discover new facts. I’ve learned much more about Paul and discovered he has much to teach us.

Just quit picking up odd phrases and building a theology and political philosophy around them. Paul says we are all equal before God–equally sinners and equally provided grace if we should so choose.

How To Come to Understand Righteousness

August 28, 2014

We find in Proverbs 2:

making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding

leads to:

For The Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth comes knowledge and understanding;

concluding:

Then you will understand righteousness and justice and equity, every good path;

This is like one of those “if…then” statements in computer programming. Only in this case, it is God teaching us about our programming.

If we tune into God, because God gives wisdom, knowledge, and understanding, then we will understand.

Henry Cloud, speaking last Sunday at Willow Creek Community Church, told a story about “Joey” and his dad.

Seems dad owns a very large business. He is thinking about succession planning and wants Joey to take over. But Joey doesn’t seem to have the fire in him to run a big company. Dad wanted to keep on providing experiences for Joey in the hopes that he might eventually catch on. Henry told dad, the fire must come from Joey. It can’t come from dad, or anyone else.

God is that way. He is always out there ready for us. But we must be the ones to catch on and ask.

If we tune in to God. How do we do that? First we decide. We’ll do a 15-minute “chair time” with God, reading from the Bible and listening for what God is saying. Then we find a small group of like-minded people with whom to share. That would be a great start.

Oh–a forewarning to you poor readers. I just got my sweaty little hands on 1,500 pages of N.T. Wright’s “Paul and The Faithfulness of God.”

In my college years while full of the liberalism of the time, I had great dislike for Paul and his supposed dislike of women and his preaching conformity to the state. (Hey, it was the late 60s. Need I say more?)

Over the years, I’ve come to appreciate Paul greatly. I can look beyond all the vast misinterpretations that have been spouted as theology. Romans is the greatest spiritual formation book I’ve ever read.

So, there will be more of Paul to come.

Get Connected To The Outside System

August 27, 2014

Successful, or as the Bible says “fruitful”, people have the ability to see the patterns in their lives that don’t work. They go through the door and leave those old patterns behind to “Never Go Back” and get caught up in them. So says  Henry Cloud in his new book.

This morning as I was about to post to this blog, I had no connection to the Internet. I was cut off from the outside world, so to speak. I couldn’t post. I couldn’t check news. I couldn’t see what happened to all the soccer games where I’m responsible for the officials. I was disconnected. My post would be late–way late.

Let me tie these two thoughts together.

People get into a pattern of behavior. The pattern becomes hard wired in the brain. But…it is possible to change the pattern. You do have to go outside the pattern.

The Second Law of Thermodynamics says that  in a closed system chaos will occur. So, we need to become an open system to go beyond ourselves. We need to get connected to God. Then we can intentionally begin to develop new patterns to replace the old ones.

And that is just what successful/fruitful people do. They go out of the door and Never Go Back to the old, unsuccessful pattern.

This all leads me to some deep meditation, though. Several times in my life I have gone into business with men who were openly Christian. You know, they always  talk about it, they have tracts laying out, talk of going to church meetings, and so forth.

Every one of them owes me money. Every one of them backed out on his word. That’s a pattern.

Now, I’m about to make an investment into a company with avowedly Christian people.

Am I about to fall into the old pattern?

I think not. This time I have done much more due diligence. This time I have taken months to understand the situation. This time I think I got connected.

When Confronted With Reality

August 25, 2014

Colin Dexter wrote a series of detective novels based on the character “Inspector Morse.” They were adapted by BBC (and shown on PBS as part of the Sunday Masterpiece Mystery summer series) and then used as the source for the latest series “Endeavor” showing Morse as a young man.

Morse puts the pieces together, comes to a logical conclusion, then discovers he’s wrong. Unlike Sherlock Holmes who was always right, Morse is seldom right–until the end.

He figures it out, discovers he’s wrong, puts the pieces together again with the new piece of information, and then he’s wrong again. This continues until the final few pages.

I just spent a half-hour this morning fruitlessly searching for the source of the observation:

There are two types of people when faced with reality: those who bend the facts to fit with their preconceived view and those who adapt themselves to the new facts.

Which are you? Do you even recognize that in yourself? Can you change if you need to?

I am instinctively like Morse. I will adapt to a new reality. It may take me some time. I may have to digest the facts. Sometimes it’s a shock to discover that you’re wrong. Or that you’re not the center of the universe.

Some people seem incapable of adapting. They tell themselves a story of how things were. Convince themselves of that version of reality (which wasn’t real). And continue on.

Is there any way to deal with such people when they remain obstinately convinced of reality the way it exists in their imagination?

Probably not.

But if that person is us, then we eventually need to come to the realization that we’ve interpreted the facts wrongly and that it is us–not the facts–that need to change.

It says in Proverbs “A fool returns to his folly.” The book was written to be like a mirror held up to our lives where we see that we are the fool, and that we need to change. I’m not sure we can change someone else, but you might ponder these questions. Where is it in our lives that we hold on to a view of reality that is wrong? What can we do to open our eyes and see?

Leadership Example Speaking Truth With Love

August 22, 2014

Ever have a boss who was ever eager to speak the truth (at least as she or he saw it? They were always ready to point out flaws, failures, something they didn’t like?

How did it feel? Especially if they were emotionally unpredictable? There is probably nothing worse that a leader whose emotions are on a roller coaster and you have no way to predict what the day/hour/minute may bring.

Ever have a boss who refused to speak the truth? Refused to speak up? Made you wonder if they were disconnected? Or interested? Could not present their point of view or confront someone who needed pulled back into the fold?

In the first case, you are probably living in fear. Or at least great uncertainty.

In the second case, if you have initiative, then you just go your own way. Each team member goes their own way. There is no semblance of team unity or focus on mission. If the team members get along with each other, then things will survive for a while. If a team member senses a power vacuum and tries to take over–then there could be critical problems.

I’ve been writing about the apostle John lately. He started out as the first type of leader. Fiery. Combative. The team member in example two who senses the power vacuum and wants to step in.

But John was mentored to speak the truth with Love. Not mushy, sentimental love. But the love that looks at other people and meets them where they are. They give the truth (or instruction or mentoring) aimed at where the other person is in life. Guides them. Mentors them. Reminds them.

A leader firm in vision yet understanding of others in the organization/committee/company leads well.