Archive for the ‘Compassion’ Category

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Let Me Be A Little Kinder

December 17, 2025

Back when I was singing a lot of folk stuff, I ran across this  song by Glen Campbell:

Let me be a little kinder let me be a little blinder

To the faults of those about me let me praise a little more

Let me be when I am weary just a little bit more cheery

Think a little more of others and a little less of me 

Christmas occurs just over a week from today. By now you are probably frazzled by sending cards, finding gifts, attending parties, planning the big dinner. 

I don’t know about you, but you’re probably like me—the more frazzled I get with busyness, the less kind I am to others.

Today is a great day to pause, breathe, and treat the next person you see with kindness (even if it’s you in the mirror). Then make it today’s habit.

There is a weird truth—the more you show kindness, the easier it makes it to show more kindness. And even stranger still—the more you show kindness, the kinder other people are back at you. The more you share, the more there is. It’s a great thing.

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Posted in Attitude, Compassion | Leave a Comment »

Notes on Being a Man

November 3, 2025

Observing the growing diversity of genders and races at engineering conferences over the past 20 years has been gratifying. I’ve been a “perp” at times over the years. When I had leadership responsibilities, I promoted unlikely people into strategic roles looking at their skill sets and social maturity. I had a female project manager and a sales engineer in the 1980s when many men were uncomfortable with that. They were good.

Melinda French Gates (Bill’s ex) recently appeared on a podcast. While celebrating the advances women have made, she noted the importance of bringing men along. I applaud the setting aside of an “us vs. them” mentality. I’m with Martin Luther King, Jr. when  he asked that we judge people by the strength of their character, not by external factors.

I have watched for years how some boys and men have not been brought along with the progress of women, people of color, and privileged white men. I would see the woman of the family driving the car, going into the bank to do business, running other errands, while the guy sits slumped in the car playing a video game.

Sometimes parents have not been a help. Sometimes no coach or teacher or neighbor has come forward to offer guidance. They’ve heard that if you don’t go to college, you’re nothing. And their talents are not in that direction.

My last podcast discussed building a workplace that respects people. We need to help bring everyone along for the ride. We cannot sit back and expect other to do this.

[Note: the linked blog post contains language and situations that some will find offensive. The message is clear, though.]

Tim Ferriss writing about Scott Galloway on his blog discusses disturbing statistics about young (and a little older now) men. They need guidance. OK, maybe sometimes a metaphorical kick in the pants. Check out Tim’s post and the discussion about Galloway’s new book.

What can we do either individually or through business to help bring these disaffected people along—all the while not forgetting to enable everyone?

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Posted in Attitude, Compassion, Leadership, teaching | Leave a Comment »

What If Church Were Different?

October 30, 2025

Ed Sheeran wrote a song, Thinking Out Loud.

Just so, I’m thinking out loud.

What if church resembled an AA meeting?

  • Honesty in recognizing shortcomings, no need to hide behind a cover of perfect
  • Supportive community
  • Guidance from a sponsor
  • No shame, guilt (there’s already too much)
  • Communion around a real table, not a metaphorical one

A priest with the curse of alcoholism said that he received more support and help from the AA meeting in the basement of the church than from the worshippers upstairs.

Just Thinking Our Loud.

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Posted in Compassion, forgiveness, Thinking | Leave a Comment »

House of Compassion

October 7, 2025

We sit quietly and still. Our breath, passing through our nose, sighs slow and steady.

We see ourselves outside a small house. The guest house of a large estate. We enter this house of compassion.

We allow our focus to rest on ourselves. We feel a warmth of compassion for ourselves in our chest. We rest in the warmth.

Another visit finds us dwelling on a person. We know that person. We feel their current struggles. We focus compassion on that person. Seconds, minutes, who knows the time. We feel that warmth in the center of the chest. The compassion extends from us to the other.

We have arrived in the House of Compassion.

Posted in Compassion, Meditation | Leave a Comment »

Laws and Hearts

September 29, 2025

I’ve read the New Testament—the story of Jesus and the beginnings of his movement. Many times.

One of the many lessons I learned from Jesus’ story was the futility of changing people’s hearts through laws.

Think through the stories of his interactions with religious people of his day. He would poke at the religiosity of their following their myriad of laws, yet the hollowness of their lives. Think of the cup brilliantly clean on the outside yet dirty inside.

The Civil Rights Movement of the early 60s formed my social and political thinking. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s  speech about judging people by the strength of their character and not the color of their skin struck a harmonic chord with my early lessons about Jesus. It’s what’s inside that counts most—for me as well as you.

The Movement led to many necessary changed laws in the US.

Observing today’s social environment, the changed laws led to very few changed hearts.

The other day I observed that if all the spiritual study in the world doesn’t change the way you live, then that time was wasted.

What does it take to change a person’s heart?

Posted in Attitude, Compassion, Ethics, Justice, Wisdom | Leave a Comment »

One Tin Soldier

September 26, 2025

So much hate spills out into our consciousness. Do people think that they can spew hate without consequence? It’s amazing how much energy we expend justifying ourselves.

Ponder this song from my youth:

Go ahead and hate your neighbor

Go ahead and cheat a friend

Do it in the name of heaven,

You can justify it in the end.

There won’t be any trumpets sounding

Come the judgement day.

On the bloody morning after

One tin soldier rides away.

(The Legend of Billy Jack, Peter, Paul, and Mary/Coven; author: peaceluvandbass)

Posted in Compassion, emotions, Ethics, Justice, Love, Peace | Leave a Comment »

Be Like Jesus?

September 23, 2025

I know a guy whose T-shirt reads, “Jesus took naps; be like Jesus.”

I can go with that.

Someone recently told me that his favorite divisive political commentator was like Jesus for he “tells it like it is directly.”

I wouldn’t compare any politician (choose your flavor) to Jesus. His message was to turn Roman culture on its head. Instead of every relationship being based on power, Jesus based relationship on love. Not sentimental love. Not necessarily tough love. But love all the same.

People who spread hate and divisiveness (choose your flavor) could use an infusion of Jesus’ type of love. 

Can you disagree without being disagreeable?

Can you live without hate?

Can you accept that people are different from you?

I know it’s hard. Nobody said following Jesus was easy.

Posted in Awareness, Compassion, Intention | Leave a Comment »

Being Empathetic

August 12, 2025

Sometimes just sitting with someone hurting is enough.

Maybe saying nothing more than, it’s tough.

Sometimes listening with our whole heart is enough.

Sometimes asking kind and gentle questions is better—followed by real listening.

The key part—being. Presence. Acknowledgement.

Posted in Compassion, Grace, Listening | Leave a Comment »

What Breaks Your Heart?

July 16, 2025

Andy Stanley asked in a recent message, “What breaks your heart?”

Discover that, then act on it.

I read the blog of Rich Dixon. An accident resulted in lower body paralysis. His story of overcoming his self-pity and riding a hand-crank cycle thousands of miles to raise money for a home that rescues children from sex trafficking. Those kids broke his heart enough to energize him to become a great leader.

What breaks my heart currently is the hate and vitriol and meanness of one group toward other groups. Even among people who identify as Christian. (If you think this doesn’t apply to you, then it probably does. Seems to be a human thing.)

 I have some understanding of the emotions that drive some of us to fear or despise people who are not like us. Perhaps even sympathy. But I don’t feel that way. I don’t know why. 

I remember meeting people not like me—or the people I grew up with—for the first time as a freshman at university. They all seemed like people to me. What’s the big deal, I thought.

From For What It’s Worth by Buffalo Springfield

There’s battle lines being drawn

And nobody’s right if everybody’s wrong

Young people speaking their minds

Are gettin’ so much resistance from behind

[Chorus]

It’s time we stop

Hey, what’s that sound?

Everybody look what’s going down

And to the point today:

Paranoia strikes deep

Into your life, it will creep

It starts when you’re always afraid

Step out of line, the man come and take you away

[Chorus]

We better stop

Hey, what’s that sound?

Everybody look what’s going down

Posted in Attitude, Compassion, Love | Leave a Comment »

Oppression

May 7, 2025

French intellectuals after World War II became enraptured by the idealistic vision of communism.

Albert Camus pointed to Stalin writing about how the oppressed became the oppressor.

Once the Christian Church was oppressed by Rome.

Then it became at various times of European history the oppressor.

Even in today’s America people who feel oppressed wish to become the oppressor.

How many people try to live out Jesus’s teachings about dealing with each person with kindness and understanding only judging each by the strength of their character?

He touched people with skin disease. He forgave a criminal. He saved a woman from execution by stoning. He made her accusers go home and ponder their own sins. He made a culturally despised outcast the hero of a story. He healed people in the household of a hated Roman soldier. He taught that unlike the Romans we should be known by how much we can love other humans.

Think upon whom you might wish to be oppressed. Perhaps a little kindness and love will go far toward reconciliation.

Posted in Compassion, discernment | Leave a Comment »

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