Posts Tagged ‘attitude’

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Making a List And Checking It Twice

December 6, 2013

Remember the song about Santa? “He’s making a list and checking it twice. Gonna find out who’s naughty or nice.”

Bet you’re making a list this time of year. Present for Johnny, present for Sue, present for spouse, present for me, too.

I like Jon Swanson’s daily meditations, 300 Words a Day. Someday when I’m making the trip from Sidney, Ohio (with an “i”) to Chicago, I should set an appointment just to meet him. I drive past a couple of times a month. He has written a book about Nehemiah, Great Works, available on Amazon. I have purchased it ($4.99) for my Kindle reader on my iPad just now. Looking forward to reading it.

Jon says in yesterday’s blog post that he was afraid that it might become just a list. Well, lists are not all that bad. One of my favorite writers, Umberto Eco, wrote a book about lists and says that the ability to make lists was essential to the development of civilization. Ben Franklin was a list maker. David Allen, author of Getting Things Done, proposes that we make several to-do lists (one for when available to use the phone, one for when running errands, one for when we’re online, etc.). I am a disciple of GTD, use a software application called Nozbe, and fail to refer to my lists often enough 😉

Lists are how you organize yourself if you are busy like I am (see yesterday’s post). One key is to know your “one great work” and key your essential to-do items to point toward accomplishing your one great work.

Andy Stanley made a verse from Nehemiah one of his key verses for personal life and teaching his children. While Nehemiah was organizing the people for the rebuilding of the walls of Jerusalem (financed by the country now known as Iran, by the way), his enemies invited him down to the plain for a “diplomatic discussion.” Nehemiah replied, “I am doing a great work, and I cannot come down.”

Nehemiah teaches us great lessons. What is your great work? Figure it out and then start making lists.

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What One Thing Would Make Your Life Better

December 5, 2013

What one thing that, if you gave it up, would make your life better?

I read that statement this morning and started thinking. This is a perfect season of the year to think about this. Those of us who attend any sort of Christian church are going to hear at least one message on simplifying our lives. On not letting pervasive advertising persuade us into thinking giving and getting more stuff is better. It may be better for the economy, but is it better for us individually?

There are now two open seats on the five-member school board in my small city. Bev wanted to know if she should keep the newspaper out for me to read about it when I get home. I told her no. I know as much as I need. I served eight years; I have no interest in going back. Besides, I’m in a season where I’ve become very busy already.

I gave up a job that paid well, but the atmosphere (to me at least) was toxic. For peace of mind as well as the chance to be creative again, I quit. Then I spent several months making money through writing while I invested money in starting a small business. No sooner had that kicked off (finally), when another opportunity came my way. Now I’m executive director (and future owner with my partner) of another business. Meanwhile, I asked an associate pastor whatever had happened to the mission trips that people went on and returned so on fire in the Spirit. No leadership, she said. So…another job. All because a man I know said, “Pray for God to bring people into your life.”

This was a lot to digest over the past 7 months. My thing is to say no to anything else.

I gave up one thing and gained a new life. This year has been a blessing. But I do need to look over everything I own and everything I do and simplify. We call it an iterative process. That means the process is never done. Once you simplify, then you look for new things to simplify. But also to say yes to the appropriate opportunities. Sometimes God’s call is too powerful to ignore.

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Those Who Love To Tell Others What To Do

November 12, 2013

There are two types of people–there are always two types of people, I guess. The two I thought I’d talk about today are those who love to tell other people what to do and those who do not like to be told what to do.

I’m proudly in the second camp.

I don’t know how that came about. Maybe I was born that way. Or maybe because neither of my parents were self-confident enough to order us around. I’m not positive about my brothers, but I think they are not the ordering around type either.

When I teach, I prefer to guide. When my kids were growing up, I preferred to guide and suggest rather than order them around (after that early stage of discipline where you have to set the limits and provide strict guidance).

That is some of the problems that Jesus initiated with his message. Since the time of Moses, the Jewish religion was primarily a religion of laws–people ordering other people to do certain things in order to be right with God. There were exceptions, of course, but this passing on of strict laws was the norm.

Jesus came along and said the important thing is not simply obeying a set of laws made up by other people who loved telling others what to do. Jesus said what matters is what is in your heart–that is, what matters is your own attitude and motivation.

Paul tried to explain this, but his explanations often became a little complicated. Then other people came later who tried the first method of developing laws out of Paul’s words and then ordering people around. The whole process started again–this time under the guise of being Christ-followers.

Let’s just go back to where Jesus was. If your attitude and motivation are to live with God, then you will naturally live a good life (allowing for the sins that come through the fallibility of being human). Jesus came to redeem us from a life of being bossed around, and from a life of guilt and shame from our shortcomings (sins), and to release us with love to live with-God and for others.

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Curiosity Is a Good Thing

October 28, 2013

We took our young grandchildren to the zoo Saturday and then on a walk along a river on Sunday. Such unbridled joy at learning something new, explaining what they already knew and curiosity about everything. Wooly worm caterpillars, crickets, grasshoppers, snakes. And that was just the walk.

People were curious about Jesus. Who was this guy who healed people and confronted the establishment? But many were merely curious without the learning part. Many combined curiosity about how to live in God’s Kingdom–enough so that they started a movement. We are the beneficiaries of that movement today.

I think about the people to whom Paul wrote his letters. Many were curious about the contents of his strange message. Some became teachers and leaders. But they remained curious. They accumulated many questions to bring to him for guidance and instruction.

There was Timothy, to whom Paul wrote at least two letters. Epaphras of Colossae who probably instigated the letter to the Colossians. They were curious people who let their curiosity lead them into learning and eventually understanding and then leadership.

Do you take a walk and just walk? Read and then forget? Watch TV endlessly?

What joy to discover the wonders of nature just where you are. To learn a new concept or idea. To learn about new people.

Curiosity is just asking questions and discovering. Knowledge comes from seeking answers to those questions. Then thinking about those answers. With a mind open to the possibilities of wonder, knowledge, growth.

I far past 6 years old, but I’m still curious about just about everything (except pop culture). How about you? Time to kindle that flame of curiosity? Time to learn and grow?

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Trying Too Hard

October 14, 2013

Do you find yourself trying too hard?

Maybe it’s your expectations for your children. Maybe it’s a message that you are trying to get across to others. Maybe it’s an organization that you are trying to move. You sense resistance and you try harder. But the harder you try, the less response you perceive.

I’ve seen this and experienced this. The very first management conference I ever attended, in the mid-70s, featured one of those motivational speaker types. I’ll never forget his core message, though, “Try Easy.”

Of course you should try to accomplish things. You should try to show the way for your children. You should try to move your organization forward. Just don’t overdo it. I’ve seen sales people fail miserably because they press too hard. I’ve seen people burn out because they try so hard they lose perspective.

Jesus said, “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your body, what you will wear…. But strive first for the dominion of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” (Matthew 6)

I have a picture of Jesus as an intense man. I bet people sensed his intensity from a long way off. And I think there was also a sense of urgency.

Nowhere do I get the picture of Jesus as pressing forward rapidly. He traveled with intention, but never seemed rushed. He seldom lost his temper.

And, he accomplished his mission.

We can also. Know your goal, your strengths, your reality. Just keep moving with intentionality. But don’t go overboard with worry and effort. Try…Easy.

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Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life

September 13, 2013

I almost always meet the nicest people. This week I have been traveling to conferences. Two days in San Antonio and then two in New Orleans. I’m at the Courtyard by Marriott by the convention center in New Orleans right now. The woman who runs the restaurant is a jewel of a person. Just like everyone I’ve met at Courtyards.

Wednesday evening I arrived in town with enough time to check in and then get over to the conference I’m attending. Got back to the Courtyard not having had dinner. She had just closed up the restaurant. But she could get me a glass of wine and rustled up some pita chips and hummus. Just what I needed. I sat in the lounge area yesterday from about 4 pm until almost 9 working. Had dinner and a little wine. She was just the nicest person with everyone.

I’ve met the greatest gate agents in airports, sales clerks, people I do business with. The guy I sat beside on the way from SAT to MSY (San Antonio to New Orleans for those who don’t speak “airline.” Great conversation.

There is a story that I’m told came through Carl Sandburg about a farmer who was asked by a couple of strangers about the type of people who lived around there. He asked them what sort of people there were where they were from. One person replied negatively, the other positively. He told them each, “I suppose you’ll find the same sort of people here.” It’s all in your thinking.

This blog post from Leo about changing your thinking started me thinking. I have had a lot of challenges and changes this summer. Quit a job that paid well in order to gain peace of mind and in order to be creative again. Started a new business. Wound up joining another business to turn it around. Took on a new ministry at church. Then my doctor thought I had some major heart problems, but after 6 weeks of some uncertainty and testing, discovered not much was going on that we didn’t already know about. (I feel great, by the way. Thanks for asking.)

What Leo said in his blog post about being grateful resonated. I found that I intentionally connected with God more often than the preceding few months. I found that in pausing daily to remember all the things I’m grateful for, I gained perspective. I found that by encouraging my natural attitude to believe the best of people, greet people with a smile, be kind all contributed to meeting the nicest people–and finding great joy and peace.

My advice–pause, look at all the things for which you should be grateful, check your thinking and change as necessary.

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God’s Logic

September 4, 2013

When we program computers or other digital devices, an essential logical statement is “if…then” or sometimes “if…then…else”. If the user taps the app icon, then open the app (else return to home screen).

This is akin to cause and effect. If you do something, then something will happen to (or for) you.

This logic is not new. 2,800 years ago Isaiah said these words to the people of his nation:

Is not this the fast that I choose:

to loose the bonds of injustice…

Is it not to share your bread with the hungry,

and bring the homeless poor into your house…

Then your light shall break forth like the dawn,

and your healing shall spring up quickly.

Isaiah 58 is written as poetry. One technique poets use is repetition of an idea using different images or words.

If you remove the yoke from among you,

the pointing of the finger, the speaking of evil,

if you offer your food to the hungry

and satisfy the needs of the afflicted,

then your light shall rise in the darkness

and your gloom be like the noon-day.

Didn’t get the idea? Then try a third time:

If you refrain from trampling the sabbath,

from pursuing your own interests on my holy day; …

then you shall take delight in the Lord,

and I will make you ride upon the heights of the earth…

Our actions have effects. They affect us. They affect others. Either for good or for bad.

Be careful what you do and say. Everyone is watching. Especially God.

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True Worship

August 30, 2013

My wife and I were discussing church doctrines last night over dinner. Well, not in depth. But someone asked her about the doctrine of a certain denomination of Christian church. She was at a bit of a loss to explain it.

I thought a little, and the many variations of denominations flashed through my mind. Mention Baptist–but there are more than 57 varieties of Baptist. There are at least three variations of Lutheran of which I’m aware–and two Presbyterian. The Disciples of Christ broke away from the American Baptists a long time ago because someone thought the Bible taught to have communion every week.

It struck me how each of these took a bunch of verses from the Bible, seemingly at random, and strung them together into a doctrine. To me, many of those are misreadings often caused by lifting verses out of context or not understanding the reference.

Then I thought (sometimes maybe I do too much of that) about how these denominations and the people in them fight all the time. People get mad and leave, only to go to another denomination and begin the process again.

Then I returned to my study of Isaiah 58.

Look, you serve your own interest on your fast day,

and oppress all your workers.

Look, you fast only to quarrel and to fight

and to strike with a wicked fist.

How often that’s what we do today! And not just Christians. Check out the other two religions that grew from Abraham’s worship of the one true God–Judaism and Islam. We all gather to serve our own interests. We seem to gather to quarrel and fight.

That’s not what God said in the Old Testament 2,800 years ago. That’s not what Jesus taught 2,000 years  ago. Again from Isaiah 58,

Is such the fast I choose,

a day to humble oneself?

And,

Is not this the fast that I choose:

to loose the bonds of injustice,

to undo the thongs of the yoke,

to let the oppressed go free,

and to break every yoke?

Is it not to share your bread with the hungry,

and bring the homeless poor into your house;

Humble means to think of others before yourself. And think of God first. Leaders, take the lesson. All of us, let’s remember the source of life. “You shall love the Lord your God…, and your neighbor as yourself.”

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Having the Right Heart and Attitude

August 29, 2013

Isaiah is almost sarcastic at the beginning of Chapter 58:

Yet day after day they seek me

and delight to know my ways,

as if they were a nation that practiced righteousness

and did not forsake the ordinance of their God;

they ask of me righteous judgments,

they delight to draw near to God.”

I added the italics on “as if.” That phrase reveals the points to come. The people say they seek God, but there is something wrong. Wonder what it is?

“Why do we fast, but you do not see?

Why humble ourselves, but you do not notice?”

So the people are also asking of God what’s wrong. In our terms they are saying, “We go to church. We donated to the church. Why does it seem that you are against us?”

Look, you serve your own interest on your fast day,

and oppress all your workers.

Ah, now we have reached the point that God charges against them. Two points really. First, when they “fast” or worship, their attention is not on God. It is on themselves. They fast only to serve their own interests. Then look at the last phrase. We’ll study more on that later. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a spiritual teaching that does not also include a moral teaching–a teaching on the way we treat other people. Those seem to go hand-in-hand.

“What is the greatest commandment?” asked the teacher to the Teacher. Jesus replied with the Shema about worshiping the Lord. Then he said that the second commandment was as important as the first–to love your neighbor as yourself.

These people were thinking of ways to take advantage of people in their community even while worshiping God. This is abhorrent to God, the God who wanted to build a community focused on Him.

When I teach the Spiritual Disciplines, I always begin with the proper attitude. Simply practicing the Disciplines will do you little good. It begins with the right attitude.

Same with leadership. Beware this judgement of Isaiah in your practice of leadership. Take care of your attitude.

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Emotional Intelligence

August 6, 2013

I was just pacing off some energy before the next four-hour plane ride in the area in front of Gate A24 in Newark. Then I noticed loud voices very close to me. They were not saying kind things.

A belligerent middle-aged guy wearing a cowboy hat had accosted a younger guy. Seems that the older guy was just wandering, weaving as he walked and the younger guy was rushing to what he thought would be a close call to make his flight. I take it he said something about getting out of my way. (But, it’s Newark, flight was delayed 35 minutes.)

As it happened, I was directly behind the cowboy. I am not trained or knowledgeable about martial arts. I had these thoughts about how I could grab his arm if he decided to swing. The younger guy just kept saying, I was just trying to get past you, why don’t you just go get on your plane.

Emotional Intelligence

I had just been looking over some old notes and saw my notes from the book “Emotional Intelligence,” by Lennick & Kiel. The first two steps toward gaining emotional intelligence are:

  • Knowing one’s emotions
  • Managing emotions

These are much harder to do than to read–and even to understand. Can you feel it when your temperature starts to rise? Do you know your various emotions and how they affect you? Sometimes make you angry. Sometimes depressed.

The second step goes beyond recognizing. It’s acting. I can still remember, to my great embarrassment, the last time I exploded. Almost 10 years ago. But I knew how I react when I’m threatened. Especially by super aggressive people. I knew the emotion. I was unable to manage the emotion.

I’m glad the cowboy picked up his things and wandered away. The other guy and his friend were like “what the heck just happened?” I was relieved that there was no physical altercation.

But I thought, airports can be a stressful environment. When you bring baggage of not the “roll-aboard” kind, you can spread unpleasantness.

Or, you could smile.

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