Archive for the ‘Disciplines’ Category

« Older Entries
Newer Entries »

Overcoming Distrust Within Families

December 16, 2016

When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly.

Not only had Joseph and Mary not lived together, yet, but they also must not have engaged in some of that “heavy making out” without actual intercourse. There was no physical way Mary could have become pregnant–at least by Joseph.

So Joseph’s first reaction was disbelief. The only possible thing that could have happened was illegal, immoral, unethical.

Imagine she comes to him. “I got pregnant. I’m not entirely sure how it happened, but God said it was through the Holy Spirit.”

“Riiiggghhhhttt” he said.

But then he’s visited in a dream. It’s OK, go ahead and marry her.

So, in a normal marriage, how often would the wife remind her husband about that initial distrust? Weekly? Daily?

But there is no indication of any further marriage problems. We hear almost nothing about Joseph. Couple of mentions. We have a lot of useless speculations. But when we don’t know, we don’t know.

But I thought how great it is to be open to new revelations. We never know when we’ll hear a whisper, have a dream, get slapped up against the side of the head to get our attention by the Spirit?

If we are open even though it forces us to reconsider our opinions and prejudices, we listen.

Yesterday I talked about mindfulness. Being present in mind when we’re present in body. This is part of it. If we slow down and are present to the possible whispers of the Spirit, the whole trajectory of our life can change.

Tags:,
Posted in Disciplines, Listening | Leave a Comment »

Living in Anticipation or Living in Frustration

December 15, 2016

Wherever I go, there I am.

Are you totally present right now? Just focused on reading this post?

Or, are you looking at this post while your mind races off in many directions?

That ancient phrase I quoted packs a lot of meaning.

This time of year is flooded with anticipation. But it is often the anticipation that leads to frustration.

We anticipate giving just the right gift that elicits exclamations of joy. We anticipate joyful family gatherings.

But…

The picture of the good, old-fashioned, Griswold family Christmas (from the movie Christmas Vacation) spring into our minds. All the old family bickering comes out as everyone is frustrated by being together. Nothing goes right. The turkey is over cooked.

They are all living in future expectations.

But just to be in the moment. Yes, we have anticipation, but we are present in the now. We experience the lights, the trees, the songs, the one time in the year when people are nice to each other.

As we rush from crowded store to crowded store, frustrated at the inability to be inspired by any gift suggestion.

It’s time to stop, children, what’s that sound….

We stop. Take a deep breath. Actually notice what is around us. Experience the sights, sounds, smells.

Tomorrow will take care of itself. Today I am present.

Tags:, ,
Posted in Attitude, Disciplines | Leave a Comment »

Visions Dancing In Their Heads Come Christmas

December 14, 2016

The “first Christmas” wasn’t Christmas, of course.

The celebration came years after the event. Christians had conquered Rome. An unthinkable event at the time of the events we celebrate. And then Christians conquered a big holiday by making it a celebration of Jesus’ birth. A triumph over paganism, if you will.

The phrase of the old poem recurs. “While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads.”

Do you ever wonder what was “dancing in the heads” of Joseph and Mary? Maybe, “Please, God, allow us to have a safe child birth?” After all, child birth was a dangerous event in the life of a woman in those days. And they were not around supporting family (we think).

We know that there were many visions dancing in the heads of Jewish people at the time.

They expected a Messiah (Anointed One, King). But like all visions of the future, there were many competing versions.

Some thought King–as in replacement of King Herod with a real Jewish leader who would restore the empire.

Some thought prophet who could perform might acts of God–like an Ezekiel or Elijah.

Both Mary and Joseph had been given visions. What could have been dancing in their heads as the little boy was born? Certainly not what happened some 33 years later.

Jesus later explained from Scripture why it pointed to him (think the walk to Emmaus). But even today Jewish scholars dispute that reading of their Scriptures.

As we approach Christmas, what visions are dancing in your head? We each have our own. I hope more than candy.

Tags:, ,
Posted in advent, Disciplines | 4 Comments »

That Moment When We Realize God’s Gift

December 13, 2016

coyote-cliff

There is that moment of sudden realization. That “Oh Crap” moment. Or on the other hand the “Ah Ha” moment.

Those old cartoon characters–they run off a cliff. But they don’t fall. At least immediately. They fall when they realize there is no ground under their feet. They give us a look. Then, zip. The looks we get from Wile E. Coyote are priceless comedy.

Kids enter December with anticipation of gifts. OK, many adults do, too.

Paul the Apostle talks about gifts. He talked about the “free” gift of grace and eternal life that God gives.

He said that it comes because of our faith–in the resurrection.

But Jesus talked often of faith and eternal life–before the death and resurrection. The way he talked about it, he meant that eternal life started right then.

Today there are many who preach that eternal life begins when we die “and go to heaven.”

You can’t get that from reading Jesus’ words.

I think we can look at eternal life a little like Wile E. Coyote’s experience–except in reverse.

It is at that moment when we are open to God through faith and we realize we’re not falling. Or, maybe we’re falling like that old Hank Locklin country song, “Please help me I’m falling, In love with you.”

The gifts we give are in remembrance of the gifts the Magi gave to Joseph and Mary for Jesus. Or, they can be.

And maybe we get that sudden realization of the moment when we know we can live life more fully the way Jesus meant for it. Here. And Now.

Tags:, ,
Posted in advent, Disciplines | 2 Comments »

Jesus Can See Us As We Really Are

December 12, 2016

So many people came to Jesus with a picture of themselves in their minds. I’ve been thinking about Jesus’ encounter with the rich young man. But there were Pharisees and religious leaders who all thought of themselves as pretty great.

img_3272

Some people are delusional. Some just clueless. Maybe their parents kept telling them how special they were. They never learned the other side.

Jesus would hold a mirror up to these people that showed them their reality.

On the other hand, sometimes he flipped those pictures (to hold the metaphor). There were people who came to him thinking they were like the bottom picture, and Jesus told them that actually they were better.

Think of Levi the tax collector and his friends. The father who said, “I believe. Help my unbelief.”

Jesus didn’t always tear down; he also often built up.

Depends upon how they came to him.

During the energy crises of the 70s when we had oil shortages and long lines at gas stations, a speaker told a conference “the biggest energy shortage we have today is human energy.”

Rather than focus on tearing down pompous people–which our media loves to do, maybe we should be focusing on the Levis of the world. And those anguished fathers. And those adolescents who feel so insecure and worthless.

We can hold up a different picture for them. It’s a picture of possibilities. A picture of what they can do with their lives while living the with-God life. That’s what Jesus did. And we are followers, right?

Tags:, ,
Posted in Awareness, Disciplines | Leave a Comment »

Talk Less and Listen More

December 9, 2016

For those of you who get up to read these essays by 7 am EST, I’m late. Plane was delayed and I got home at 1 am. 

Here I am. Five hours of sleep. Nothing prepared. Nothing on my mind.

But I try to write leadership thoughts on Fridays.

So, here is the thought of the day. Works for leaders. Works for parents. For spouses. Even for public speakers 😉

Talk less; Listen more.

I could give examples. But…you get the point. What are you going to do today?

Tags:, ,
Posted in Disciplines, Leadership, Learning | 2 Comments »

Give It All Away

December 7, 2016

“You lack one thing; go, sell what you own, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.” Mark 10

Giving. ‘Tis the season.

The Magi were what passed in that day as combination scientist, astronomer, spiritual seeker. They spotted conditions that told them there was a disturbance in the Force. A baby, but more than a baby. 

They traveled maybe 500 miles, maybe 1,500 miles. But they didn’t just pop in an airplane or even a car. It would have been a sizable caravan most likely. Three gifts (we don’t know how many Magi).

How far would you travel under what hardships to give precious and costly gifts?

Well, for the rich young man, not very far. Actually, not at all.

There are people who give when they hear about a specific need. The church building needs a new roof. You just heard an emotional presentation about the plight of children or women somewhere.

Then there are the people whose very life is organized around being generous. 

I think maybe Jesus was touching on that idea with the young man. Sure you can follow the commandments. And, yes, that’s not easy. And it is devotional.

Something is lacking. Something called the orientation of your entire life. The status of your heart. Am I focused on me? Am I focused on loving my neighbor? (Remember, that’s Jesus’ second commandment.)

Most of us will give gifts at Christmas. That is no moral wrong. But what drives us? Tradition? Obligation? Generosity?

Can we say, “I give because of what I am”?

Tags:,
Posted in Disciplines, Gifts | Leave a Comment »

There Between Passion and Prejudice Lies Jesus

December 6, 2016

Human nature is like a stable inhabited by the ox of passion and the ass of prejudice; animals which take up a lot of room and which I suppose most of us are feeding on the quiet. And it is there between them, pushing them out, that Christ must be born and in their very manger he must be laid – and they will be the first to fall on their knees before him. Sometimes Christians seem far nearer to those animals than to Christ in his simple poverty, self-abandoned to God. — Evelyn Underhill

I love this picture. It captures our inner condition and ties it to the Christmas theme.

Making the mistake of scanning news this morning, I saw yet another example of Christians proudly wearing their prejudices. Why do we make everything political? Even theology?

I figure that to follow Jesus I must study Jesus. How do I know if I am doing what he wants and being the kind of person he wants me to be unless I study?

So I study.

And nowhere do I find Jesus telling me to do or say the things that millions of people who call themselves followers do and say.

Noel Paul Stookey, the “Paul” of folk singing Peter, Paul, and Mary, wrote a song with the title “Hymn.” He talks about a person who shows up at church occasionally and finds things sterile and political. He says about when they passed the collection plate, “I just had time to write a note, and all I said was ‘I believe in you’.”

It is the simple things that are so hard. What inhabits your stable?

Tags:, ,
Posted in Disciplines, Faith | 2 Comments »

Do What You Say; Say What You Mean

December 2, 2016

Did you ever end a phone call where the other person said, “I’ll get right on that and call you back shortly” knowing that there was never going to be a return call?

How about when Jesus was walking somewhere and met 10 individuals with a terrible skin disease? He told them to go show themselves to a priest. That meant that they would be healed of the disease and the priest would give them a certificate of cleanliness. And one of them came back to say thanks. And Jesus said, “Were there not 10 who were healed? Where are the other nine?”

One of them returned to complete the loop with thanks.

I was in my favorite little coffee place this week and recalled that a guy had called me and said he’d see me sometime in the coffee shop for some consulting (for free, of course). But he has never come.

The number of people who have said they would get back to me has numbered in the hundreds in my career in business, church work, and non-profit work.

It’s like an epidemic.

Must be one reason why Jesus said at one point, “Let your ‘yes’ be ‘yes’ and your ‘no’ be ‘no’.

Do what you say; Say what you mean.

A basic rule for getting along in society. Don’t be the person with the reputation of never following up. Be the person who calls when they say they’ll call, otherwise they tell you frankly that it’ll be a while or that they can’t get to it. Better to say “find someone else” than to leave them waiting.

Tags:,
Posted in communication, Disciplines | Leave a Comment »

The Power of Routine

December 1, 2016

Routine, in an intelligent man, is a sign of ambition. –W.H. Auden

I love routine. Rise at 5:30 am, read, write, post a marketing message for a local coffee cafe, breakfast, exercise. And so on.

Maintaining a routine while traveling is always tough.

Steve Jobs famously made a trip to Japan and saw how the companies all had employee uniforms. He thought, if I had a uniform, then there is one fewer decision I must make daily. So he always wore a black T-shirt and jeans. Routine. His mind could focus on more important things that what to wear today.

Bill Hybels, senior pastor at Willow Creek Community Church in South Barrington, IL, tells a story about a man who came up to him after a service and talked about how he had turned his life around. What did you do? “I get up a little earlier in the morning and spend 15 minutes in my favorite chair reading the Bible. Every day,” he replied.

That has become a Willow Creek mantra. “Chair time.” Try it. Even when traveling.

Mihaly Csikszentmihaly studied creative people. He is credited with defining “flow”, that state of being you get into when you are totally engrossed in what you’re doing. “Most creative individuals find out early what their best rhythms are for sleeping, eating, and working, and abide by them even when it is tempting to do otherwise. They wear clothes that are comfortable, they interact only with people they find congenial, they do only things they think are important.”

What is the result of adopting this routine or rhythm of life? “Personalizing patterns of action helps to free the mind from the expectations that make demands on attention and allows intense concentration on matters that count,” concludes Csikzentmihalyi.

Over and over in the New Testament, we read things such as “Jesus, as was his custom” and “Paul, as was his custom.” I’ve always been impressed with the description of the life of Daniel, the prophet, who early on decided upon his diet and took time out from administering a vast empire to pray three times a day.

What’s in your routine?

Tags:,
Posted in Disciplines | Leave a Comment »

« Older Entries
Newer Entries »