Archive for the ‘Wisdom’ Category

Learning Through Overcoming Incompetence

August 15, 2025

My music life began with percussion lessons at about 8 or 9. I was in the University of Cincinnati band a year. Feeling percussion was a bit awkward to move around with, I taught myself guitar from books and friends.

My practice slipped for a few years for several reasons among which were moving and Covid.

Then I did a little performing discovering that a few years off from both playing and singing causing major negative effects.

I also have a hereditary condition (prominent among those of Irish and Nordic descent, and I have Irish ancestors) called Dupuytren contracture. Hardening stiffness of the tendons of the hand cause fingers to contract. My case is mild. The massage therapist helps. I picked up guitar seriously again as a method of stretching my hand.

Starting again was not like riding a bike. My mind said it knew hundreds of chords and patterns and progressions. My hands said, “What???”

  • First, I had to admit incompetence.
  • Then, I found an online teacher.
  • Following his advice, I developed an intentional practice.
  • Before anything, I added Farmer’s Carry to my resistance training routine. I grab a 40 lb. dumbbell in each hand, stand upright, walk for about 60 seconds. It strengthens grip, lower arms, and abs.
  • Then I pick up and tune the guitar each time. I can mostly do it by ear.
  • A series of scales stretch fingers, strengthen the pinkie finger, and practice proper finger placement.
  • Next are a series of practicing difficult chord changes over and over.
  • I finish with chord progressions for a series of songs.
  • Practice bled over to singing bringing a return to breath support, stop forcing, find natural voice.

Why all this detail? This bleeds over into spiritual practice. It’s all about doing things intentionally.

  • Admit incompetence realizing that dashing off a few thoughts called prayer doesn’t bring me closer to God.
  • Meditate with intention (I’ve had teachers, but I found a new online teacher).
  • Read with intention—not just to get in a number of words but to intentionally discover what Jesus wants me to learn from the reading.
  • Spend time in nature on walks thinking/reflecting.
  • Find an avenue of service (spiritual practice is not all internal, it must include serving others).

Neat, Plausible, Wrong

August 14, 2025

There is always a well-known solution to every human problem—neat, plausible, and wrong. HL Mencken

Some people sit in libraries or their studies reading books and deriving theories about how things should work and how other people should think and act.

Mencken’s thought reminded me of a saying that undereducated people develop simplistic answers to complicated problems, while overeducated people develop complicated answers to simple problems.

Some problems are simple problems requiring simple solutions.

Many times problems are messy requiring compromise and rethinking. The solutions may not satisfy everyone.

We need to learn to live in a world without perfection. Living within paradox has some tension but in the long run is most satisfying.

Working With Stressful Emotions

August 6, 2025

I remember the date, place, people with me, and cause the last time my anger overcame me. To be honest, anger was often lurking just below the surface looking for a trigger event to take over. From the time I was a youth, I could flip from quiet to not quiet, so to speak.

Ancient wisdom tries to teach us about becoming the master of our emotions. 

Science meets wisdom. In a recent newsletter on health and fitness, Arnold Schwarzenegger writes:

When stress hits, most people think they need to shut down their emotions to stay in control. But real control isn’t about avoidance—it’s about awareness.  Emotions are messengers, not marching orders. The goal isn’t to feel nothing. It’s to learn how to feel without losing yourself. If you’ve ever been told to “just let it go” when you’re stressed or upset, you probably rolled your eyes. But there’s actual science showing that accepting difficult emotions — instead of fighting them— rewires how your brain works. Accepting your emotions activates completely different brain networks than trying to suppress them, leading to less rumination and self-criticism.

Some people let go—much to their later recriminations. Realizing that expressing that emotion may not be appropriate, we try to suppress it. Schwarzenegger paints this picture:

Think of it like this: suppression is like holding a beach ball underwater—it takes constant effort and energy. Acceptance is like letting the ball float on the surface—no struggle required, and your brain can redirect that energy elsewhere.

I often turn to the wisdom of ancient Christians. In this case, the master of psychology, John Clymacus, aka St. John of the Ladder, who wrote The Ladder of Divine Ascent.

He says:

The first step toward freedom from anger is to keep the lips silent when the heart is stirred. I say, Amen to that, brother. The next, to keep thoughts silent when the soul is upset; the last, to be totally calm when unclean winds are blowing.

Achieving this calm can only come if we have practiced becoming calm through meditation and intentional prayer.

And another thing from John—All anger and bitterness disappears before the fragrance of humility.

Humility may be a tough path for us Americans. Maybe for other humans, as well. Yes, another practice—putting others before ourselves.

Words Matter

July 31, 2025

While on vacation in Scotland last week, I saw news that crossed my technology professional side regarding Artificial Intelligence with my spiritual formation professional side about being able to say any hateful thing without repercussion. (I really don’t know the whole “woke/anti-woke” non-debate. I really don’t want to know! Being me, I would probably not endorse either camp.)

When politicians speak, I use a translator like the Babel fish in Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. Some people call it a BS filter. That’s a little different. I use that often listening to marketing people.

But something I do know—because of long, hard, bitter experience. Words matter.

Used properly they build up, heal, guide. Otherwise they spread hate, hurt people, demotivate.

It’s easier to slow down and choose the right ones than it is to try to take the wrong one back.

At least four books have come my way recently about the importance of holding civil conversations with people with whom you may disagree.

Most would go along with my previous post about Be Curious, Not Judgmental. Ask questions and listen—honestly, really, listen. Not to argue. But to understand. It’s not noises in the ear canal. Engage brain, engage heart, focus on the other.

Kindness, care, gentle spirit, accepting (even if not agreeing).

Like the Youngbloods sang in 1967, “Come on people now, smile on your brother, everybody get together try to love one another right now.”

[Note: The Babel fish is a small, bright yellow fish, which can be placed in someone’s ear in order for them to be able to hear any language translated into their first language. Ford Prefect puts one in Arthur Dent’s ear at the beginning of the story so that he can hear the Vogon speech.}

What We Are Responsible For

July 23, 2025

Dan Millman in Peaceful Warrior Newsletter – July 2025

It wasn’t until I met the Sage (Dr. David K. Reynolds) that I fully understood that neither I nor anyone else has direct control over arising thoughts or passing emotional weather — and therefore, no responsibility for random thoughts or emotions. (We can only be responsible for what we can control.)   In fact the only thing over which we have a good bit of control is our behavior — how we move; the actions we take. And we are responsible for our actions whether or not we happen to feel inspired or motivated or fearful or angry or sad.

Wisdom resides in our understanding of what we cannot control and must therefore live with and understanding what is in our control and working on it.

Independence Day

July 4, 2025

Every year I suggest that all Americans take some time to read a few things to refresh our memories about the founding of our country. It’s probably not a bad practice for all of you who do not live here just for the ideals.

Read 

  • The Declaration of Independence
  • The Preamble to the Constitution
  • Actually the entire Constitution
  • If not all, at least the first 10 amendments—the Bill of Rights
  • Bonus points—read The Federalist Papers

These documents are full of compromises—something that has made it last so long. And something we seem unwilling to do this past decade or so.

Unless You Become Like Children

July 3, 2025

Learning is not compulsory…neither is survival—W. Edwards Deming, quality master

There are people who have a set of things they know and judge all events and actions against that set. There are people who have the continuous unease of not knowing. The former can be typed (perhaps too rigidly) as “FJ or Feeling Judgmental” on the Myers-Briggs Types Indicator. The latter as “TP or Thinking Perceptive.” Anyone who has read more than a few of my thoughts can easily figure out which type describes me.

At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.—Matthew 18

As with all spiritual texts, this can be open to numerous interpretations. I choose in this context to reflect on “beginner’s mind.” Wisdom about as ancient as humans in community recognizes that if our heads are full of knowledge or “stuff,” then there is no room for growth, for learning.

Unless we change and become as little children, that is, unless we are open and fascinated to learn more, we will be stuck where we are.

Seth Godin remarked, “Learning is the difficult work of experiencing incompetence on our way to mastery.”

Unless we become like children—stumbling until we suddenly walk; needing an adult to keep the bicycle up until suddenly we are riding; stumbling over pronouncing a new word until suddenly we are fluent.

Where do you feel the tension of unease of not knowing that will entice you into trying until you learn?

What You Become

June 26, 2025

Ancient wisdom—You become what you think about.

Shane Parrish writing in Brain Food, updated the thought. You become what you scroll.

Don’t be like the loser in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade about whom the Last Crusader remarked, “He chose poorly.”

Drip by Drip

June 6, 2025

Inch by inch, row by row, gonna make this garden grow. All it takes is a rake and a hoe and a piece of fertile ground. — Folk song written by David Mallett

A series of caves populate southern Ohio’s Hocking Hills region. Thousands visit Ash Cave, Old Man’s Cave, and others every year.

Drips of water formed these limestone attractions over the course of centuries. Patience, persistence, unending.

This era has been captured by the hype of sudden change. The organization, be it business or church or non-profit, will grow suddenly as if overnight.

Organizations, and yes, even our lives, are actually built slowly over time like those limestone caves.

Like the Garden Song, we hoe a bit by bit and over time we realize how much we have grown.

Realizing Who Is God

June 2, 2025

Religion is not so much telling man there is one God as about preventing man from thinking he is God.—Nassim Nicholas Taleb

Somewhere buried in my library is a book by Erich Fromm, You Shall Be as Gods: A Radical Interpretation of the Old Testament and Its Tradition.

Contrary to what Fromm wrote, when a human begins to believe they are God, good things never occur.