Archive for the ‘Disciplines’ Category

How We See Others

January 15, 2016

As a leader, how do you see your group? Not as a group, but as individuals.

Do you see them as hard working, dedicated, intelligent people? Or as lazy, slothful, needing constant supervision people?

I had a job once where I could get more done working from home than coming to the office. My boss said, “Well, as long as you’re working.” I thought, “Sheesh, no one puts out more work than I do, and he makes that comment.”

This phrase just popped up in my reading, “Your perception of me is a reflection of you.”

If you are looking at the team you are leading as a bunch of people you can’t trust to do their work. Maybe the problem really is you. Maybe you know that you’d like to slack off and are suspicious of others who might.

There was a story about a man traveling the back roads of the Midwest in the early 20th Century. He came across a farmer. He stopped and asked, “What sort of people live around here?”

“Well, what sort of people lived where you are from?”

“They were a lying, thieving bunch of people.”

“Well, I guess you’ll find people here about the same.”

A second traveler came by later and stopped. Asked the same question. The farmer asked what sort of people there were where he was from. “Honest, hardworking, trustworthy people,” came the response.

“Well, I guess you’ll find the people around here to be about the same.”

It is a great story pointing out that our perceptions are often colored by our emotions, thoughts, and opinions. We see what we want to see.

When I’ve dealt with people as a leader, whether as a parent or manager, I always just have this expectation, usually unstated but clear by insinuation, that people will live up to being what they were meant to be. I expect the best for other people.

When you deal with others, how do you view them? If the results are not forthcoming, perhaps a good look in a mirror is in order. Change your attitude toward others and watch how their attitude changes.

Teach Us To Pray

January 14, 2016

“Lord, teach us to pray.”

Writing about prayer yesterday dredged up some memories of teaching people to pray. Paul has much to say that is practical. Jesus’ disciples asked him point blank one day. He responded with the “model” prayer that we call the Lord’s Prayer.

Once in my idealism, I offered a class on how to pray to my church. There were a few takers. My idea was to, well, er, teach them how to pray. As in, let’s see an example of a type of prayer, then spend the rest of the class practicing that prayer. You know, contemplation, intercessory, supplication–the whole thing.

The trouble was–they didn’t want to practice. They wanted what we call “book knowledge.” But they were uncomfortable actually praying.

Did the same thing with a class on spiritual formation. We gathered a dozen people into our family room and I led them through Richard Foster and Dallas Willard. What I tried to do during those 10 weeks or so was to get them to start actually practicing some of the “Spiritual Disciplines.” Did we pray daily? Study daily? Fast regularly? Worship? Serve?

They just wanted to learn the words from the book. I don’t know if any actually changed their life practices by incorporating a daily habit of spiritual practice.

Funny thing is I read constantly. But when I find something worthwhile, I try to add it into my daily or weekly (depending) habits. I’m far from perfect, but it would take a book to discuss the growth in my life due to spiritual practices. More even-tempered. Discernment. Ability to recognize the needs of others.

I think when Jesus taught his disciples to pray that he expected them to actually pray. Pray to recognize God’s holiness. Pray for our daily sustenance. Pray for God’s kingdom. Pray for others. Even pray for ourselves.

So let’s lift up our hands and actually pray–and follow Paul’s advice to do it without arguing or anger. Prayer is so powerful; it will change your life.

 

Lift Hands In Prayer Without Anger or Argument

January 13, 2016

Do you ever get tired of scanning your Facebook “news” feed? I do.

Sitting here studying in Paul’s first letter to Timothy, “I desire, then, that in every place the men should pray, lifting up holy hands without anger or argument.”

We can’t even go to a church full of people who call themselves disciples of Jesus and pray without argument. Either we argue amongst ourselves or we argue about everyone outside the walls who doesn’t agree with everything we hold as opinion.

I just wish I could scan through my Facebook “news” feed and see more of that and no anger, hate, cynicism, misinformation bordering on lies. How about we stop trying to tear everyone down and start working for the improvement of our society, community, nation, world? That is my fervent desire.

Instead of complaining and whining about people from other ethnic origins and countries, what can we do to help people in Jordan and Iraq deal with the refugee problem there? Instead of disdain toward those in need in our community, how about we serve them?

Find someone who needs help and focus on that instead of yourself and your problems. That is what my master taught. It’s hard to follow, but it’s my job.

It’s even into sports. The Bengals/Steelers NFL game Sunday was packed with drama–not so much about the outcome of the game which was wild–but about how much illegal violence and bad sportsmanship would be exhibited.

The Steelers’ quarterback was injured and taken to the dressing room in a cart. Bengals fans cheered his injury and threw objects at him on the journey.

Days after the game, players and fans were still whining, pointing fingers, denying the obvious.

That’s just sports. Try politics. In America it sometimes appears that no one is interested in working toward the common good. It’s all about scoring points against the opponent. Attributing every evil known to man as a characteristic to the other party.

And most of these people, if you asked them, would claim Christianity.

Fortunately this is mostly just the outspoken people. But too many of those are politicians. Most of the country, indeed, most of the people in the world, just want to live in peace, help their neighbors and those in need, worship God. But we don’t hear from them.

Let us all try to pray diligently with our hands raised to God not in anger and argument.

Is It All About Me

January 12, 2016

You deserve everything. Go for everything you want. You deserve it. — Horoscope

Horoscopes these days seem a little like “Dear Abby” advice. Some days when I’m a little bored, I scan the horoscopes for a chuckle. The other day, the one above was mine.

Many books have been written analyzing the mental health disease of our age, the conclusion–narcissism. Narcissists view others from the point of view of how others impact them. “Did you see what she did to me?” Not just “did you see what she did?”

There’s a lot of “I deserve it” attitude. “I’m entitled.”

Jesus said (Luke 14), “If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple.

What he’s asking us is who’s in charge. Am I all in for myself? Or, am I all  in for Jesus? Who is first?

Someone who truly has narcissism personality disorder won’t be changed by a blog post or by reading some words of Jesus.

The rest of us can read and learn. Jesus did change some people’s focus. They learned to start considering others first. They learned that it is not all about themselves.

Sometimes we need a reminder. Our first response might be for our own comfort or desires. Then we remember.

As we serve others once, then twice, then eventually it becomes habit. Habits build character. It becomes our nature–who we are. We are people who consider others first.

 

Evolution 2.0

January 11, 2016

There are two types of people. There are always two types of people.

One has great faith and belief that the Bible explains science, and specifically believes that the English translation “day” in Genesis 1 means literally a day as we define it–24 hours.

The other has great faith and belief in a particular view of “science” some call “scientism” derived from the writings of Charles Darwin in the “Origin of the Species.”

These are both faith positions based on an interpretation of their different “holy books.” They like to argue with each other. But no conclusion can ever be reached. They can’t even agree to disagree. Total conquest of the opponent is the only imaginable outcome.

A different view

Sorry to break the usual speaker’s trick, but there are really other types of people. I, for example, am trained in both science and the Bible. I don’t agree with either of the two positions. I believe that there exist a great many people like me.

I do not wish to argue any merits of either position. I’m merely introducing a book sent to me by a friend written by a man I know through business.

“Evolution 2.0: Breaking the Deadlock Between Darwin and Design” by Perry Marshall is a book of considerable scholarship written in a totally non-scholarly way. Marshall’s study began with a crisis of faith caused by the conflict of science and faith.

He’s an electrical engineer who took the approach of communication, information, and networking engineering to the study of the two views of evolution–showing the evidence for a type of evolution yet thoroughly debunking the scientism views of the avowedly atheist Darwinists such as Richard Dawkins.

If you are in neither of the two types of people and if you have an inquiring mind, I recommend the book. Not necessarily because I agree with everything he writes, but because it should cause you to think. And that is a good thing.

If you are in one of the two groups of people above (although the one type most likely does not read this blog), then don’t bother. It will just get your blood pressure up.

As for me, whenever there are two poles of a dichotomy, I automatically presume that there must be a more rational alternative. Then I set out to find it. Perry’s set out an agenda for my scientific reading for a while.

But as for my faith, it does not rest on this argument at all. My faith rests on my knowledge of the presence of God and of the resurrection of Jesus. Science for me is just an inquiry into trying to understand the mind of God who created all this wonderful life.

Great Leaders Have Great Interpersonal Skills

January 8, 2016

We were at a dinner. It was a special dinner with several courses each paired with a wine. The idea was to teach a little about wine and also sell the wines, of course.

It was a group experience. Most of us came as couples, not as a large group. We entered the room to discover it was set up with several long tables. We were going to share a table with six people whom we did not know.

The man adjacent to my wife was an owner of a local company. He was personable. Asked a lot of questions of my wife and the other people. Seemed genuinely interested in the other people’s lives.

My wife has been to many business dinners with me by now and has met many business owners or ranking executives. She comes from a working class background, so it was initially all new to her.

After the dinner on the drive home, she said, “Men like him are always interested in other people. They make others feel at ease. They are interested in others.”

An astute observation.

Recently while reading on leadership, I ran across this observation, “Great leaders have great interpersonal skills. They care for their people. As a leader, you need to know how to listen quietly and hear what people are really saying, by asking questions and being open to the truth. When challenges come, it’s especially important to open up and show you care.”

I’m watching a friend start a new business. He really cares about all the people he has hired for the team. He guides those who need a little help. He encourages each one. It’s a joy to watch.

No matter where you are called to be a leader, this is a great role model. Leadership isn’t all about me. It’s really all about them. How can I help them? How can I nurture them? How much do I care?

 

Lost In The Futility Of Their Minds

January 7, 2016

Have you ever met someone who is so smart that they are actually ignorant? They have so many ideas rattling around inside their skull that often nonsense comes out of their mouth (or computer)?

These people are not only atheist philosophers. I have met people who call themselves Christians who live entirely in their heads. Religion is intellectual, ideas, agreements with propositions.

Sometimes people study things to overcome their own deficiencies. Perhaps I’m that way. For a couple of years at the university, especially the year I wasted in graduate school studying political philosophy, my goal was to be an intellectual. University was all about ideas. In fact, some philosophers who were really all about spirit were labelled “idealists” meaning they thought ideas were real.

Now, I often observe that people think too much. They read too much into other people’s writings.

Now this I affirm and insist on in the Lord: you must no longer live as the Gentiles live, in the futility of their minds. They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God. They have lost all sensitivity. (Ephesians 4:17-19 excerpted)

After the era of Freud, people seem to like to psychologically analyze other people. They think about others problems. Sometimes they explain away evil acts by saying it’s all their mother’s fault or some other such nonsense. (OK, I like Jung and James far more than Freud from that era, I’ll admit.)

We read the Bible and try to dissect every word as if we were scholars who had lived with the nuances of the language for a lifetime.

Jesus basically said it’s all about the status of our heart. It’s how we live out love. Paul emphasized grace. He also was concerned about how we live out love–but he was worried that people would return to being legalistic about it instead of living in the freedom of grace.

But freedom didn’t mean thinking about whatever you wanted to until you slowly went insane. Thinking that leads to understanding of God is good. Better is getting up every day and deciding to once again live out God’s grace by sharing it with others.

Stop sitting around thinking; start reaching out to others in love.

What Are We Seeking

January 6, 2016

Do you have a “life verse”?

I never heard about that concept until just a few years ago. Bill Hybels talked once about having a verse from the Bible that was his guide. I’ve heard of others who pick a verse for the year.

This is something I’ve never done. Just never entered my awareness. It seems like a good thing.

Recently I heard a talk where the speaker talked about choosing this one as his verse of the year:

Seek first the Kingdom of God…

This is interesting and very  much worth contemplating.

Seeking? Am I seeking for something this year? That would be actively looking for, expecting, intentional. Something like the shepherd seeking his lost sheep, or the woman seeking her lost coin, or the father seeking his lost son.

Am I seeking more business? A new mission? A new friend? Money? Health? Happiness?

Jesus suggested that we choose one thing first to seek. There are many things I want. Some I am intentionally praying in expectation for. But what is the most important? What should I seek before anything else? The one thing that would bring everything else along with it.

Jesus had a suggestion there, too. The Kingdom of God.

Jesus had many analogies and metaphors of the Kingdom of God. They all seemed to have a common thread of finding God and letting him live in my being. Or, perhaps better, like I am a branch on a grape vine. The juices that bring life to me, the branch, come from God. It is as if I have sought him out and his spirit, his life force, flows through my veins.

Seek first the Kingdom of God. Yes, I think that is a good theme for the year. A good pursuit. Every day I get up and think, am I seeking for the Kingdom of God today?

Seek first the Kingdom of God and then all these things will be added unto you. I like that.

God’s Grace Is Better Than Rules

January 5, 2016

One thing about rules–everyone can have their own set. And feel good about it. A set of rules that we say we’re following places us apart from other people. And at a higher plane. We feel closer to God.

When I scan the news of the day, I see self-described “Christians” or people the news media enjoys calling “Christians” doing all manner of bad or evil things all justified by saying that they are following their set of god-given rules.

Maybe that is a reason Andy Stanley likes to say that calling yourself a Christian is pretty meaningless since it’s so hard to define. Jesus-follower, though, that is very well defined and hard to do.

I’ve been deep in study of Paul’s letter to the Galatians. He shows his anger and disappointment in those early believers because they slipped back into being rule followers instead of grace accepters.

Very early in the journal of the Acts of the Apostles, Mr. Jewish Christian himself, Peter, is shown by God that the Gospel and God’s Grace are available to all. Forget the rules that set Jews apart from everyone else. The Gospel breaks that all apart.

Grace is sufficient.

My heart breaks when I see people who think that they are following Jesus overcome with anger and hate and drawing up rules that set them apart from others.

That is the very attitude that has driven so many people I know away from the church and made them suspicious of the Gospel.

It’s easy to see why. Would you rather join a group that is suspicious of outsiders, bound up with rules, and shuns or even hates people who are different–or join a group that is welcoming, laughs and smiles a lot, sings, helps people in need whoever and wherever they are?

Every once in a while step back and look at the groups you are a part of–church, small group, service organization. See it with the eyes of an outsider. Is it welcoming? Is it helpful? Does it reveal God’s grace to others?

If not, it’s time to either work to change it or to say good-bye and find another group.

We teach new soccer referees that the profession is the only one where you are expected to be perfect from the first minute you set foot on the pitch and then improve!

Sometimes we treat people coming into church the same way. You need to be perfect according to our rules before you come–and then get better!

Grace says, join us first. Discover grace. We’ll get better together.

What Kind of Person Will I Be This Year

January 4, 2016

Now in Joppa there was a disciple whose name was Tabitha, which in Greek is Dorcas. She was devoted to good works and acts of charity. … All the widows stood beside  [Peter], showing tunics and other clothing that Dorcas had made.

This is a story found in the Acts of the Apostles where Peter brings a woman back to life.

Let’s consider the woman, Tabitha, in the context of thinking about looking forward toward our new year. Who do I want to be this year?

First, she–well let’s pause there a second. She. To all those rigid people who misread Paul and other texts, here is an early example of an important woman disciple.

OK, I’m not going to be a she, but I can certainly learn from her example.

She was devoted to good works and acts of charity. I don’t write enough about the spiritual discipline of service. But if I could be known as a disciple who does good things for people, that would be good.

Sort of reading between the lines, it appears that she was a leader of a group of widows. Women who had lost their husbands were at the mercy of others in that society. Remember how the apostles wanted Paul to raise money to support widows back in Jerusalem? One of the powerful acts of service of early disciples was caring for the unfortunate, such as widows.

She must have been a leader of the group, discipling them, doing good works such as making clothes for them most likely out of her own wealth.

For this next year, i’d like to be like Dorcas–do good works, lead a small group into discipleship, help people out of my wealth.

That would be a good year.