Gary Mintchell

Author Archive

Recognizing When I’m Wrong

March 26, 2025

Sometimes we believe things only later to discover we have been wrong. What is our reaction?

We quickly discount the new information as “fake news”
We quickly begin to search for ways the new information cannot be right
We consider the new information and change our views

The Myers-Briggs Personality Types Indicator in the third field poses a dichotomy of J and T. The J personality type would most likely choose the second alternative. The T would go with the third. (Hint: I’m an ENTP). The reason I prefer the Enneagram to the M-B is that the latter seems to imply a static personality. Proper use of the Enneagram is to explore what caused you to be a certain type with those particular nuances encouraging continually adapting behavior to grow more whole.

I propose we all need to work on using the third response. That is the heart of Adam Grant’s latest book, Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don’t Know.

The latest newsletter from Arnold’s Pump Club (a health and fitness newsletter I highly recommend for tending to the physical health part of our life) emphasizes that trend. Adam Bornstein, You Can’t Screw This Up: Why Eating Takeout, Enjoying Dessert, and Taking the Stress out of Dieting Leads to Weight Loss That Lasts, lists 31 myths that he has believed and taught in his past that he discovered later were wrong.

Samples:

All sugar needs to be removed (the poison is in the dose)
Motivation matters, and if you lack it, you’re weak-minded. (I’m embarrassed to say I once believed this; I’m so sorry.)
If you can’t stick to a behavior, it’s because you don’t care or don’t work hard enough. (Behavioral change is complicated and starts with shifting self-perception.)
Artificial sweeteners are harmful to all people (They don’t sit well for some and are completely tolerated by others)
Good foods vs. bad foods is a smart way to teach people how to eat better (it’s not).
Social health doesn’t influence physical health.
Emotional and mental health doesn’t influence physical health.

Let us pause and reflect. What things do we believe that we’ve found get in the way of a healthy spiritual, physical, social, and emotional life? What things do we need to leave behind? Where can we grow into a life full of gratitude and generosity?

I agree with the Apostle Paul when he said that our bodies are the Temple of the Holy Spirit, and we should take care of it. Of course, illness and infirmity strike. But somehow we can make the best of what we have. The myriad of physical improvements we can make certainly help us with our spiritual disciplines.

Posted in Disciplines, Physical | Leave a Comment »

Jesus Facing Conflict

March 25, 2025

So many psychologists and other assorted experts have been writing about the many interpersonal conflicts within our society right now (as if that’s a new thing!), that I thought I’d take a look at how Jesus dealt with conflict. If I maintain that I am a follower, then I must look to him and learn from him.

I have outlined a short book or pamphlet on the subject and have begun the thinking and writing. I’ll probably outline ideas here. Feedback with other ideas is always welcome. My teachers both in academia and corporations taught me to write as if I know what I’m talking about. Many times it’s really current thinking that is always open for something new that can expand it.

Chronologically, the first conflict that Jesus dealt with according to the Gospels (Matthew and Luke) was with the person identified as the Tempter, the devil, Satan. I think if we applied this to ourselves, we would identify it as our inner demons, dark thoughts, emotions.

In the literature of spiritual development, a first spiritual “high” always precedes a time in the “desert” facing temptations.

Just so, Jesus follows his baptism and hearing of God’s blessing with 40 days of fasting in the wilderness. He was then faced with three temptations.

One was food. He had been fasting, that is, intentionally going without food as a spiritual practice to help one become open to God’s word. He was tempted to use his power (which we lack) to turn stones into bread. This was followed (Matthew and Luke differ on the order of temptations) by the lust for power. The Tempter offers him temporal power over all the kingdoms. The other temptation was immortality—jumping from a high building into the ravine below trusting God to save him.

Jesus calmly evaluated each situation. He turned the story from himself to God. He quoted from God’s word to refute the temptation.

I’m guessing that most people reading this do not think they are Jesus. How do we translate these into something meaningful for us in this era of conflict with friends, family, social networks?

We first become aware that we are facing an adversary—those thoughts and emotions that well up from deep in our gut. We must pause and consider. Are these things emphasizing bodily pleasure, lust for power, or prodding our desires to be like God?

We must pause. Then we can look to our teachers or our Teacher. He taught us to look first to God. What is God’s desire for our life? Can we muster the courage to turn our backs on temptations letting them wither and die for lack of support? Can we return to the practices that bring us closer to God and lead us to serve our fellow humans (and other creatures)?

Posted in Awareness, Disciplines | Leave a Comment »

Getting Charged, But Where To Go?

March 24, 2025

I have an electric vehicle. I must plug it into a power source to maintain a charged battery.

Some Christians use church in that manner. They plug into a place weekly or randomly in order to get charged up by fast-paced rock music followed by a polished motivational speaker.

Sometimes that reminds me of a story told by a comedian about being on a college football team. They were behind at half-time. The coach gave a rousing talk to get them fired up to go out and win the game. At the height of emotion as they headed to the door to leave the locker room and head to the field, the door was jammed.

All fired up, and nowhere to go.

I charge the car so that I can go somewhere useful.

Someone at the fitness center told me about where they attend church. It’s a small, country place. But they have community. Someone has their back; they have someone’s back. They have lunch together. They perform acts of service together.

They get charged through gathering. They go out to do something.

As one of my bosses used to say, “It’s a beautiful thing.”

As a bonus, I’m passing along the website of an author/singer/songwriter I just heard about last week—Amanda Herd Opelt. She writes from the heart.

Posted in Attitude | Leave a Comment »

Letting Emotions Go

March 21, 2025

We are all subject to a parade of emotions through our awareness. Anger, envy, pride, lust, listlessness, greed. These provoke us.

I love to read the Desert Fathers. They were early Jesus-followers trying to figure it all out. They were strange at times. We must remember they were writing to other monks and not to us. But wisdom may be gleaned from their thinking.

A brother became concerned about whether these random thoughts and emotions were sinful and would prevent his communion with God.

He asked Abba Poeman about this. And the “old man” said, “An axe cannot cut down the tree by itself.”

OK, I’ll provide an explanation.

The thought or emotion by itself won’t grow and harm you. But, if you metaphorically grab that axe, that is, dwell on the emotion, thinking constantly, letting it take up active residence in your life, then you are ripe for sin.

I have anger; I am not anger.

I have thoughts of lust; I am not a lustful person.

I see someone’s possession; I am not a person dwelling on thoughts of needing also that possession.

Become aware of the emotion attacking you. Intentionally let it go. Ignore it or divert your attention elsewhere and let it slide away unwanted and uncared for.

Posted in emotions, Wisdom | Leave a Comment »

Unprecedented Move

March 20, 2025

A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away I took a year between undergraduate and graduate school to earn some money to pay off debts and prepare for the next step. During that year I met a young woman who became my wife.

We moved from Ohio to Louisiana where I had an assistantship to work on a Masters degree. Halfway through that year, the faculty voted to disband the program. I had a job offer back in Ohio, so we moved back to my home area of western Ohio. The temporary job turned into a permanent (well, as permanent as anything really is) position. We stayed in the area.

One day, my wife asked, “How much do you think we could get if we tried selling our house again?” Two weeks later we had sold the house. Now, where to move. Well, our family resided in the Chicago suburbs.

Five years ago today I met the moving van at what was no longer our house. They loaded up everything. I pushed (with my neighbor’s help) the last of perhaps 2,000 pounds of excess stuff we’d accumulated to the street for the rubbish pickup. And, poof, we were gone.

That entire process was six weeks. On March 23, I met the moving van at our new house along with the cable guy bring me an internet connection.

That was also the first day of the Covid lockdown. Covid plus a new environment and loss of our fitness center and church did have an impact.

I guess all that should have been traumatic. I think we survived quite well.

Sorry for the autobiography, but five years is a milestone.

Posted in Awareness | Leave a Comment »

Why, Why, Why

March 19, 2025

Del Shannon asked back in the 60s

To end this misery and I wonder

I wah-wah-wah-wah-wonder, why

Why, why, why, why, why she ran away

I come across this in my studies. I encounter it when I teach. Or even in conversations regarding Bible study.

I don’t understand this thought. In fact, I think I disagree. This thought leaves me downright emotionally disgusted.

We have several options.

We can ignore the passage (hard to do if we’re emotionally involved)
We can just cut it out and pretend it was never there
We can call the author names and decide that not all the Bible is true
We can quit reading the Bible altogether and cut ties with Christians

—Or—

Like Del Shannon, we can wonder why, why, why, why, why.

I purposely wrote why five times. A time-honored technique for finding the root cause of a problem in manufacturing is to ask why five times. Imaginatively called the Five Whys, one will discover the answer usually before five. On a recent interview, the head of creativity at Disney said that in his experience it may take asking six or seven times.

<Statement>I don’t like this passage.

Why?

I don’t agree with it.

Why?

It offends my values.

Why is that, what values do you have versus those?

Why do you hold those views?

(Statement, maybe taught as a child or read it somewhere, etc.)

Why did you believe that rather than this?

But I add another step—

What if?

What if I can show you a companion thought that places this thought into context?

And so on.

Try this on yourself. Try it with a friend. Caution—when asking why don’t sound like a defense attorney cross-examining a witness. We ask why from curiosity. We must ask as a curious person who then listens carefully to let the other person fully explain. Pauses after the comment are acceptable. That shows thoughtfulness and consideration.

Posted in Disciplines, Study, Thinking | Leave a Comment »

Love Your Enemies

March 18, 2025

Jesus set such impossible ways of living for us. We try to live according to his teaching. How could we possibly do this?

Love our enemies?

Early venture capital fund director and current executive coach Jerry Colonna stated on a podcast interview about loving even your enemies. While neither he or the interviewer was a Donald Trump supporter, he responded to a question about loving even him.

Colonna replied that he can see the injured little boy trying to live up to an exacting father, and he could love that little boy who was injured for life.

19^th Century American writer Henry Wadsworth Longfellow noted, “If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each person’s life enough sorrow and suffering to disarm all hostility.”

Meditation teachers for most of my life have taught about awareness. Expanding that awareness beyond seeing just me (which many people are not even aware of themselves) to those around me and even far from me.

These practices can help us bring Jesus’s teaching into our lives in order to somehow bring some love even to our enemies.

Posted in Love | Leave a Comment »

Good Quality of Life

March 17, 2025

Aristotle wrote and taught about 350 years before Jesus walked the earth, yet I think that Jesus would have agreed with much of his thoughts about life. For example, inculcating habits of moderation, generosity, and self-control. These qualities elevate not only mood but also the quality of life itself.

Happiness Professor Arthur Brooks says that Aristotle had a unique take on happiness. Instead of seeing it as something to be found, Aristotle believed it was something we attract by living well. He called this eudaemonia, or “good spirit,” and argued that happiness visits us when we practice specific virtues and turn them into habits.

Similarly, I think that following spiritual practices (prayer, meditation, reading, and the like) attract the Spirit of God into us. And when the Spirit of God resides in us, the quality of our life improves.

Posted in Disciplines | Leave a Comment »

What Matters Now

March 14, 2025

That is actually the title of a book discussing business leadership and strategy by Gary Hamel. I opened my eyes following meditation staring at that title.

It’s a wonderful thought for the day.

One of the many things that annoy me about almost all media that’s shoved at us these days (even my favorite news sites fall into this trap) is speculation. This might happen!! Or What if this??

These only lead to emotions such as worry or anxiety. Publishers wish to invoke those emotions so that you’ll come back for more…oh, and by the way, look at the ads.

I understand the need to forge an income. My other blog has a sponsor. Most of my business life found me figuring out ways to serve customers or shave costs in order to make enough profits to pay us and enable the organization to survive.

The key for us on the receiving end lies in the daily (hourly?) reflection on What Matters Now.

I cannot solve the leadership crisis in countries or the wars and destruction ongoing in our world. I can find ways to serve others in my communities. I can find ways to grow intellectually and emotionally. I can find what matters now that I can work on—and then do it.

Posted in Awareness, Intention | Leave a Comment »

Looking for Cause of Life

March 13, 2025

When someone dies, we usually want to know the “cause of death.” Especially if we are addicted to TV detective mystery shows, cause of death is crucial to the investigation.

This may be an indelicate inquiry, but if someone were looking at your life, would they need to inquire into a “cause of life?”

How many people seem to be sleep-walking through life! No interests, no service, not much in the way of relationships.

Intelligence is not a factor. I’ve known fascinating people with either lower IQ or biological emotional problems who pursue interests with the ability to talk through them to anyone who cares to relate.

On the other hand, some highly intelligent people just seem lost in the world.

Once again, how about you (and me)?

Perhaps we are involved in important work.

Perhaps we need to climb out of the rut we’ve built. It can start with small acts of service to others. Accompanied with walks in nature. Movement helps. Paying attention to others adds crucial herbal flavoring to life.