Posts Tagged ‘Character’

People You Can Live Better Without

February 26, 2015

From Proverbs:

18:24 — Some friends play at friendship but a true friend sticks closer than oneโ€™s nearest kin.

22:24 — Make no friends with those given to anger.

I saw this blog describing people you can live without.

Other people can cheer you up, or they can drag you down. Did you ever consider how long it takes to recover from a chance meeting with a negative person? Even if you try to maintain a level personality, a few words can bring down your emotional well being and cause grief.

It is difficult to be productive with such an attitude. A negative co-worker is like an anchor weighing you down to the bottom of the sea. A negative friend does not help you succeed. A needy person can suck all the energy out of you.

Take a lesson from Lidiya K as well as from Proverbs. These are people you can live without. Try to sever relations as quickly as possible.

Here is her list. Can you add to it?

  1. Complainers.
  2. The ones that are with you only in good times.
  3. Those who donโ€™t believe in you.
  4. Victims.
  5. People who gossip.

Look instead for people who build up other people. People who are servants. People who are wise.

It Is More Than Knowledge

November 10, 2014

James tells us, “But be doers of the word, not merely hearers who deceive themselves.”

Bible study is one of the basic Spiritual Disciplines. I certainly practice that daily. I know tons of people who know more than I.

Yet, I was struck with a convicting thought this morning. Why is it we can know so much, yet we have so much trouble putting our knowledge into action?

How often do we leave an interaction with someone and the thought hits us that we know better than how we acted–or failed to act???

I guess the first thing we need is awareness. It has always been my problem that I’m lost in thought and fail to really notice other people. It has taken me years to become more aware of people around me. Help them with a door, or dropped object, or anonymously pick up a check at a restaurant.

Or, when a woman brought a bouquet of flowers to a friend from Mexico at the dinner Friday evening, I said, “Boy I wish I were thoughtful like that.” Oops. My wife heard that remark. She said, “Me, too.” ๐Ÿ˜‰

After awareness comes intention to help. It is a way of thinking and being. It becomes instinctive. You just help others. Eventually it is part of your personality. When people think of you, they think, “What a kind and helpful person.”

That becomes the goal. Knowledge helps bring us closer to God. Doing shows us as Disciples of Jesus.

Foundation of Leadership

January 23, 2014

Recently my attention was brought to the little letter the apostle Paul wrote to Titus. In this letter, Paul instructed Titus how to establish the local church. He was much concerned about the qualifications of the leaders.

Remember that Paul’s task was two-fold. He was an evangelist who spread the message of Jesus to the greater world of the Gentiles. He was also the consolidator of the revolution. He turned the movement into an organization. Eric Hoffer, called the “Longshoreman Philosopher” wrote an interesting book, The True Believer: Thoughts On The Nature of Mass Movements. You can still get this book on Amazon. I read it in the 60s. That is where I first had my eyes opened to the greater work of Paul.

Paul left Titus behind in Crete, a place thought to be quite barbarous, to lead the group of Jesus-followers. He wrote that Titus should establish a formal leadership of “elders” and “overseers”. Then he explained to Titus the qualifications of the leaders.

As I read the list, I was struck by the fact that all the qualifications dealt with character issues. He didn’t mention organizational skills, what today we’d call leadership skills, speaking skills. He basically said, select men with good character.

He said elders should be “blameless.” It’s not that they are without fault, after all, who could be that. But the congregation can look at their life and see that they do not act in ways that bring disrepute. They should be a strong leader of the family. This is the first crucible of leadership training. If they cannot lead their family, how can they lead the church? They should overuse alcohol to the point of often being drunk. They should not be rebellious.

Paul continues with overseers (bishops, but not in our sense, yet), that they are to be good stewards, not arrogant or greedy, not quick tempered or violent. They should be hospitable, prudent, upright, devout and self-controlled.

Don’t you wish that our business, government and church leadership reflected those qualities of leadership?

If you are called to leadership, either in your family or a committee or an organization or business, it would be wise to reflect on Paul’s criteria for leaders. How do we measure up to this standard? Does our character qualify us as leaders?

According To Their Character

January 21, 2014

I got a little swamped Sunday evening and yesterday recovering from my trip to Mexico. This is really yesterday’s post.

There are so many wonderful people in the world. Notwithstanding the depravity I saw in the “red light” district of Tijuana (in all my travels, I’ve never seen so many prostitutes per square yard), I met many truly wonderful people. In our political debates, often Mexicans are pictured in negative ways. People think negative things about Mexicans personally. I’ve seen the prejudice, and dealt with it, on the soccer pitch.

But I was in Mexico, so I was surrounded by Mexicans. What wonderful people.

Thinking of the holiday the US sets aside to honor the legacy of Martin Luther King, Jr., I recall his words that all people should be judged by the strength of their character not the color of their skin. Those are words that I have always tried to live by.

That can become a spiritual discipline. Recognizing that every individual is created in God’s image by God can change the way you look at other people. “She’s made in God’s image.” “He’s made in God’s image.” “Did I just diss that person who is made in God’s image?”

Let’s work on that discipline this year.