Archive for the ‘Disciplines’ Category

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No One Wants To Be A Racist

November 1, 2016

The phrase “locker room talk” suddenly hit the public news media recently. It was used to explain or justify talking crudely about women or people of other races.

Ever wonder what locker room talk is?

Me, too. The only sport I played was tennis. We didn’t have a locker room. 

Pro athletes spoke up and said their locker room conversations were nothing like that.

In my life I’ve been around “man talk”, of course. Almost never have I been part of “girl talk”, of course. So my experience is somewhat limited. Outside of three long months I spent in a fraternity in college, I’ve never been around conversations describing women and sexual exploits and the like. Those were probably post-adolescent boy fantasies. 

Racial comments are frequent in many places. Mostly white-guy “jokes” or comments about another race being lazy, worthless, criminal. Sometimes not another race but another culture of the same race. “Hillbilly” used to be a term of derision. Now maybe it’s redneck?

Shane Claiborne in the book I cited yesterday, Red Letter Revolution: What If Jesus Meant What He Said?, commented, “No one wants to be a racist, except for maybe some really mean people.”

I think he’s right. I’ve heard people make the meanest comments about people of another race. Then later when the term racist was brought up, they would remark, “I hope you aren’t calling me a racist.”

We don’t hear what we ourselves say.

Robert Burns, the Scottish poet, said it centuries ago, “O wad a giftie gie us, to see ourselves as others see us.” 

How often do we reflect on what we say and do? And feel embarrassed? I have those flashbacks every once in a while.

Jesus did show us the way. And typically for him, he set the bar so high that we can never feel complacent. His culture was very racially defined. The Jews (like many other tribes) tried mightily to keep themselves separate from people of other races. 

Yet, Jesus healed the child of the woman “who was Gentile, of Syrophoenician origin.” He led a Samaritan woman to a deeper spiritual understanding of God. These were doubly groundbreaking. Not only were they not his race, they were women.

Like in everything, Jesus shows us the way. If only we can get our hearts right so that we can follow. No says I want to grow up and be a racist (well, with a few psychopathic exceptions). But we do. It’s hard loving people who are different. But as followers of Jesus, we need to follow him there, too.

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What You Say Reveals Your Heart

October 31, 2016

Anyone who makes no mistakes in speaking is perfect, able to keep the whole body in check with a bridle. James

For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. Jesus

A theme underlying the popularity of one of our candidates for President seems to be recovering the ability to say whatever you think. No filter between emotions and mouth. No more watching what you say for fear of offending someone (political correctness).

There is a segment of society–mostly men from what little I can gather–that feel bridled. They can’t tell racist jokes. They can’t call women fat. They can’t call groups of people by slur words.

Interesting that James some 2,100 years ago identified that same problem. But he didn’t sympathize. He identified the unbridled tongue as a wild fire.

Saying whatever comes to mind from whatever source leads to many things, and none of them good. James observes based on a long tradition in Jewish thought (and most likely from other sources as well) that the tongue guides the body. An unbridled tongue has the same effect on our bodies as the actions of a horse without a bridle.

The unbridled tongue has started riots, caused people to be killed, injured family members causing disruption of relationships.

Jesus takes it a step further.

What you say is a reflection of what is in our hearts.

When we think it is our right to speak whatever we want, that could be true. But is it wise?

As we learn to set our hearts on the better things, we will find ourselves less and less apologizing for speaking unwisely.

Can we say along with a keynote speaker I heard last week, “You could mic me on a five day fishing trip to Montana with my buddies. When you play back the recording, it would not make my daughter blush.”

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Energy Is a Foundation for Leadership

October 28, 2016

A second-rate night club lounge singer from Las Vegas witnesses a mob crime, runs away, and hides in a convent disguised as a nun. She is persuaded to become the choir director, rocks the church, and performs for the Pope.

Who in the world would ever believe a story line like that? Well, it became a move starring Whoopi Goldberg called Sister Act.

I stared at our small collection of DVDs last night for some reason and the red title caught my eye. What was the essential element the Goldberg character brought to that convent?

It was energy. Her energy was contagious. It had been a lethargic and unmotivated group of women. She not only rocked the choir, she also got them involved in a number of neighborhood projects.

Don’t the best leaders you’ve known exude energy?

It shows in different ways.

  • They truly enjoy the work they are doing
  • They encourage everyone around
  • They see things that could be accomplished
  • They are prepared
  • Wherever they go, they promote the cause
  • They may be intense but never negative
  • They are not afraid to try new things, break new ground

Feel the need for some caffeine right now? This energy doesn’t come from chemicals in that manner. But energetic leaders do things such as:

  • Care for their bodies through good nutrition and exercise
  • Care for their souls through reflection, prayer, meditation
  • Care for their minds by constantly reading and learning
  • Listen to other people
  • Develop intense curiosity both about work issues and a variety of outside interests

Energy–the foundation of the universe. Capture some and pass it on.

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I’ll Pray About That–Really?

October 27, 2016

“I’m so sorry about you losing your job and your car breaking down. I’ll be sure to pray about that.”

“I’m sorry to hear about all your troubles, Sarah. I’ll pray that someone helps you out.”

“I need repairs to my house. I’ll pray about that.”

Ever wonder about the person whose response to people is, “I’ll pray about that?” Or, in my long career I’ve come across several business leaders whose response to business problems was, “I’ll pray about that.”

Shane Claiborne, one of the authors of Red Letter Revolutions: What if Jesus Really Meant What He Said?, wrote, “But sometimes when someone says, “I’ll pray about that,” it is code for “I’m not going to do anything else for you.”

Prayer is good. It is part of a spiritually disciplined life. Especially when it goes beyond the idea that God is the Great Vending Machine in the Sky dispensing good things to those who meet his criteria.

Claiborne continues, “If we hear someone asking for prayer over and over because they need work done on their leaky roof, we should keep praying, but we might also get off our butts and get some people together to fix the roof! When we ask God to move a mountain, God may give us a shovel.”

I have witnessed the power of prayer. I’ve seen healing when doctors thought it impossible. I’ve seen lives change.

But, I’ve never seen prayer “work” when it’s obvious that God wants us to work.

We can pray about the devastation in Haiti (remember that? how soon the news media moves on and we forget about things), or we can raise money for supplies. Or maybe we have a medical or other specialty where we can go and work. And pray for success at the same time.

Or, we can pray for someone and bring a meal. Or pay for a repair. Or take them to lunch.

Let us resolve not to use “I’ll pray for you” as code for “Let me out of here before I have to actually do something.”

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Living Within Your Gifts

October 25, 2016

Jesus was concerned with the state of  our hearts. Paul taught that, as well, but he became focused on how we live in community. I think maybe he obsessed on it.

Part of living in community is for each of us to work within our spiritual gifts. He talked about it in letters to the Romans, Corinthians, Ephesians.

Have you ever tried something for which you are neither well prepared or particularly talented in. You tried playing the piano (thanks, mom) but you have no particular feel for music. You tried management, but your heart was really in doing the work more than organizing others to do the work.

What happens when we are living out a role for which we have not gifts?

  • Our stress levels go up
  • We begin losing friends
  • We cannot sleep well
  • Worry is our constant companion.
  • We work harder and longer, yet it’s never enough
  • People tell us we don’t laugh like we used to
  • We catch ourselves blaming others as things go wrong
  • We begin to sense a distance developing between ourselves and others

Some people have the blessing of knowing early what their gifts are and what they want to do with them. Others of us struggle through our 20s and even 30s. Maybe our experiences are laying a foundation for later, but we haven’t found that calling.

Then, we find work and role that for which God created us. And we do it.

  • We have joy in service–for that’s what it feels like
  • We have joy in learning more and more about this new role
  • We attract people rather than repel them
  • We may work long hours, but it doesn’t seem like work
  • We can see success and progress even when it looks like we may fail
  • We take responsibility for our own work

Are you unsure of just what your giftedness might be? There are many self evaluation “tests”. I’ve taken a number over the years. I know my Myers-Briggs profile. I’ve had others as part of employment processes. You can go to Google and find evaluation sites.

Or maybe you know, because what you are doing is a joy. That is a great blessing.

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Do Words Lose Power With Over or Mis-Use

October 24, 2016

I’m in a Hilton this week. Return trip to Austin. There I was ready to take an early shower to get to a 7am breakfast meeting.

I’m staring at these bottles. Mega-what??

I choose words carefully. I also choose words that I hope translate well to an international audience. And I wonder, how do these words impact emotions as well as intellect.

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Mega-Rich. Mega -Rich.

I stared. Mega-body? No. Mega-rich body. Then I saw it was a brand name. Mega-rich shampoo.

How many things can be “mega”? Really?

How many of us just read over the words. Are we impacted by that word anymore? It’s just a brand or marketing speak or something.

I wonder the same things when communicating Jesus.

Are what I call the “Christian code words” still powerful?  When we read “sin” do we understand that to which it refers? Or is it just a negative sounding word that means some old lady or old guy is condemning us–sight unseen?

I try to find new ways of expressing the emotion or action that is meant by some of the code words. I’m well aware of the many Christians who listen to a message or song and sub-consciously count the number of code words. If the number hits a threshold, then it is labeled good.

The latest John Fischer podcast conversation featured songwriter / singer Bob Bennett. He was talking about writing songs to reach people who are not followers of Jesus. But that the music publishing houses wanted songs that met the code-word threshold rather than songs of struggle and overcoming.

Bennett said, “It’s like the man who, at a dinner party, reaches over to cut his neighbor’s meat.”

We need to make sure that we are really communicating. Are we over-using words to the point that they lose their appropriate emotional meaning? Are we failing to use words that say what we really mean in a context that can be really heard?

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Three Ingredients Of Innovative Life

October 21, 2016

Infants contracted childhood leukemia. It was a terrible disease. They would bleed profusely. Doctors gave a series of powerful chemicals. One would work for a week or two and then stop. The next–same thing. And through all four known drugs.

A young doctor hired into the program to study and treat the disease. He observed and asked questions. Then he had an idea. It was so revolutionary that he was criticized for several years as an evil and stupid doctor. He said, “Why not give them all four drugs at the same time?” Take them as close to death as possible with these very toxic drugs that also, by the way, were the only known way to kill the cancer cells. Nurse them back to health. Repeat. Once a month. Every month. For 24 months.

In 1965 Dr. Emil Freireich was ostracized from the medical community for trying this. By the early 1970s it was the standard of treatment.

Malcolm Gladwell wove that story into his talk on innovation that concluded the Dell EMC conference I attended this week. He was one of two headlining speakers who are both among my favorite writers–the other being Kevin Kelly. But I only have space for one today.

We all have reason to exercise our innovation genes. Whether turning around a failing company. Or turning around a failing ministry. Or maybe just living a more fulfilling life. Here are three thoughts from Gladwell’s research.

Sense of urgency

Freireich was watching infants and children die. Every day. And he wanted a treatment–now.

Be disagreeable

OK, not in the normal sense we use it, but in the way psychologists would use it. As well as the apostle Paul. This means that we do not need the approval of others to proceed with where we’re going.

Growth mindset

When we wake up in the morning, we don’t expect the world to be exactly like it was when we went to bed. We expect some changes and deal with them.

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Living For God In The Midst of Diversity

October 20, 2016

I am blessed. Out of a series of seemingly unconnected events plus my life of preparation, I entered a profession combining my love of technology and my love of writing.

The industry is filled with basically good and smart people. It sort of reminds me of the sign at the boundary of a village we once lived in–Population 1000 good people and one grouch. There are almost 6,000 names in my contact data base and many people have come and gone without making it into the contact list. There can’t be more than 10, maybe only 5, who were that “one grouch.”

Here’s a photo from the technology conference I’m at this week in Austin, Texas. Dell Technologies (you know, “Hey, Dude, you got a Dell!”) annual gathering. The photo doesn’t show as much diversity as you’d normally see. We are “social influencers” and Dell marketing people.

social-influencers-at-dell-emc-world

But there are people from all over the world here. Just this week, there were conversations with people from all around Europe, India, Dubai, China, Southeast Asia, Japan, and many more.

It must be boring to live in a rural area or a city suburban enclave where everyone is just like you. There is so much to learn and experience.

And almost all have some level of hunger for a spiritual life. They may be Hindu, Muslim of one of many flavors, Christian of one of many flavors, Buddhist, pagan (yes I have avowedly pagan friends), searchers. If you talk for a while, you discover the humanness of all.

Then you stop to realize that God created each and every one of them. And God loves each one. And offers his grace to all. And you listen to people talk about people who are different from themselves at least at some superficial level like skin color or language, and you ask, “Why?”

Paul wrote to people who were living for Jesus in the midst of great diversity. He, as well as the people he wrote to, just accepted that. Especially the letters to the people in Corinth, but also to those in Ephesus, he said live for God, but deal with the others. And in so doing you will attract others to faith in Jesus.

We know that diversity in the workforce builds a stronger company. I bet that diversity in our churches would build a stronger church. Who are we turning away because they are different from us? The better path is to talk with everyone who crosses our path remembering they are also children of God.

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Facing Doubts, Uncertainties, Fears

October 19, 2016

It is impossible for me to know the depths the struggles, fears, uncertainties of being a woman in today’s climate.

Even though I am by nature empathetic with others, I cannot completely step outside my experience shell to know at a deep level.

Even a simple a thing as running in the park just after dawn where I just run, but women have told me they fear going too far back or even being alone. I said once that I had never seen anything. She said, “I have.”

I first heard about Allison Fallon through Donald Miller’s blog (the author turned marketing consultant). She writes from her deep struggles. She opens eyes to people can perceive (see yesterday’s post). She wrote yesterday On Being a Woman In the World Today.

2,100 years after Jesus showed us men how to treat women and after Paul taught the mutually submissive lifestyle, there remains the struggle. The struggle to feel good in the face of a presidential candidate who rates women on a scale of attractiveness. The uncertainties facing a world where men can violate a woman in America and get off with a slap on the wrist.

Menlo Church where John Ortberg is the Senior Pastor has been teaching “It’s OK to Not Be OK.” Last Sunday Scott Scruggs taught on the book of Lamentations. That book begins by questioning God and ends by questioning God. He looked at “Doubting” Thomas, and how even guys who had lived with Jesus had trouble believing.

It seemed an appropriate teaching after reading Allison. Sometimes we have questions and just cannot comprehend where God is in all that. But then we meet people or find a worship experience where God shows through. Maybe it’s still a struggle. But there is some hope.

The other experience I cannot relate to is on the men’s side–the ones who abuse women and children. How can they do that?

Yesterday I talked about the condition of the heart. Today, it’s more of the same. If only we could reach out and help perform the Jesus type of heart surgery. That would be cool.

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We May Listen But Not Understand

October 18, 2016

To you have been given the secret of the kingdom of God, but for those outside, everything comes in parables; in order that ‘they may indeed look, but not perceive, and may indeed listen, but not understand; so that they may not turn again and be forgiven.’  –Jesus

I have tried blocking political stuff from my social media feeds so that I can see what people are doing in peace. But it seems to be inescapable.

That part that does slip through has no (as in none) information that is truthful or enlightening. There is no probing into issues or how candidates would actually carry the country forward or represent it to the world. The untruths, half-truths twisted one way or another, character assassinations drive me to drink (well, not really, but I wish).

I’ve been studying the words of Jesus lately. Sort of “red-letter Christian” if you will. Early in Mark, he is recorded in the explanation above. “So that they may indeed listen, but not understand.”

Do you feel like that describes discourse in America today?

We aren’t alone in that in the world, unfortunately. Because I cover manufacturing technology globally, I must become familiar with the situation globally. Many other countries suffer from the same dilemma.

Hmmm. Sounds as if this is a human condition–not simply an American one.

And that was where Jesus operated. He probed deeper than politics. Remember the Roman coin question? He probed into what we call the heart. In that day, instead of heart, they talked about the gut. As in, when something bad happens, we say we “got hit in the gut” (abdomen below the rib cage). That is really where we feel emotions. I think that word brings the meaning home more than the word heart, which has become so sanitized and romanticized over the centuries.

Jesus was concerned with us as individual people. He’s concerned with the way we conduct political discourse. He’s concerned with the way we conduct any discourse.

Are we indeed looking but not perceiving? Listening but not understanding? Or as he said later, “He who has ears, let him hear.”

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