Author Archive

Open Our Eyes, Lord

January 9, 2025

I got this story recently from Dan Millman’s Peaceful Warrior newsletter, but I’ve seen it before somewhere. Like a parable of Jesus, this should make us think.

Imagine walking along a sidewalk with your arms full of groceries and someone roughly bumps into you so that you fall and your groceries are strewn over the ground. As you rise up from the puddle of broken eggs and tomato juice, you are ready to shout out, “You idiot! What’s wrong with you? Are you blind?”      But just before you can catch your breath to speak, you see that the person who bumped into you actually is blind. He, too, is sprawled in the spilled groceries, and your anger vanishes in an instant, to be replaced by sympathetic concern: “Are you hurt? Can I help you up?” Our situation is like that — when we realize that our own ignorance is the source of disharmony and misery, we open the door to wisdom and compassion. -B. Alan Wallace

The Power of Example

January 8, 2025

In influencing others, example is not the main thing; it’s the only thing. -Albert Schweitzer

A teacher from my high school years impressed a lasting image on my mind. She taught nutrition as one piece of her curriculum. She was eating a lunch that could hardly be called nutritious. When a student pointed out the inconsistency (as high school students will), she replied, “Do as I say, not as I do.”

How can one be an obnoxious jerk preaching love fail to understand why the message falls on deaf ears?

How can one preach values and fail to live up to commitments?

How can a group market themselves as welcoming, and yet they fail to make room at the table for a newcomer?

The inverse of what that teacher said is the real truth—what you do speaks louder than what you say. 

Make it a practice to observe actions.

It’s The Simple Things That Work

January 7, 2025

Among the subjects I study (and practice) are fitness and nutrition. From a newsletter I receive:

We’ve all seen diets come and go, but the truth about weight loss is simple: it’s not about finding the “perfect” plan; it’s about making small changes you can keep — and eating foods that keep you fuller for longer.

They found that increasing protein and fiber led to the most weight loss — and eating more of those foods ensured that you were shedding fat and maintaining more muscle.—Arnold Schwarzenegger

I find that if you shed social media gorging focusing on reading that provides the equivalent of protein and fiber, in other words, spiritual writing and wisdom literature that has stood the test of time, will reduce your spiritual, emotional, and mental fat maintaining or even growing your muscles in those areas. 

Pleasure or Enjoyment

January 6, 2025

I have written about happiness guru Arthur Brooks before. He wrote a bestseller with Oprah.

From his recent newsletter:

In his 1990 book, Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, the psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi argues that enjoyment gives you a sense of effort, forward movement, and accomplishment. Or, as two psychologists wrote in 2021, during enjoyment, one “commits oneself to savoring the situation and engaging in the task to have positive feelings of joy and fun.”

Enjoyment is better than pleasure because it is more conscious and permanent. As Csikszentmihalyi points out, everyone gets pleasure from eating when they’re hungry, but it takes some knowledge and cultivation to enjoy food. After you finish lunch, the pleasure is gone, and in fact, the idea of eating is no longer appealing because your physical need has been satisfied. Meanwhile, the memory of a meal enjoyed with friends transcends the immediate experience and can bring good feelings long after it is over.

Or consider—did you just gulp a beer or savor a glass of fine wine?

Advertisements for 60 years and then social media influencers on steroids have pushed the idea of momentary pleasure at us. Have we the strength to push back?

Consider spiritual discipline. Do we partake of a burst of pleasure at putting down someone of a different faith practice on social media? Or do we obtain the pleasure of perhaps a half-hour reading a spiritual text with contemplation?

Culture Continually Changes

January 3, 2025

I’m at an age of reflecting over a long career. Many writers in the variety of media prefer to consider how bad things have gotten. I reflect on the many improvements I’ve seen.

I’ve completed a few trips in the past month. Several things struck me.

Drinking—Maybe I’m just not invited, but I don’t see the amount of extravagant alcoholic consumption of most of my career. I saw a survey noting that the share of companies hosting the “traditional” alcoholic party declined from 90% to 64% 2007 to 2024.

Once my eyes were opened to nuances of human interaction, I began to notice the number of pick up dances. Not that I was hit on much—women instinctively know a geek when they see one. But for a time I traveled with a guy who looked a lot like Harrison Ford. I lost count of women who came up to me when he left for the restroom and asked if it was true… 

On a recent trip I noticed a number of men and women at the hotel bar. Not a single attempt. Although at another trip I saw a guy who tried butting in to a girls’ night out group. He wasn’t getting anywhere.

These are but a few examples of change attitudes. I see others of people who have changed for the better over the years. Losing the edge and obnoxiousness of someone trying to achieve acceptance or notoriety; becoming more at ease in who they are.

Sure…I’m a long-term optimist. How could I be a Jesus-follower and be otherwise?

Understanding or Opinion

January 2, 2025

There is Understanding and Then There is Opinion

Try out some wisdom on yourself that is at least 3,000 years old. I guess people have been the same since the beginning of culture. From the book of Proverbs (18:2)

A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing personal opinion.

We experienced that often even before social media amplified it I seldom watch TV news, but what I have seen amplifies this with the appropriate (trained) facial expressions.

I catch myself—have I researched this appropriately or am I merely parroting some thought that originated in Russia or China?

Or, perhaps we violate this additional warning (18:13).

If one gives answer before hearing, it is folly and shame.

How often we impulsively blurt out an often stupid opinion on someone’s problem without ever fully listening and understanding.

I have that problem, too. Working on it…

Sit and Think

January 1, 2025

How have you used your precious time and attention so far today? This week? What will you do tonight?

Have you ever been in the shower and forgotten whether you have shampooed your hair yet because you’ve been lost in thought?

I remember I think it was second grade. So I was maybe six. We were sent outside for an extra recess. There were men cutting down a tree and then cutting it into pieces. I was totally focused on what they were doing and how they did it. I have no idea how long it was before I realized that there were no other kids around. Strangely, I just went back to the classroom and found my seat. I don’t recall any comments.

There is a story, this could have been me but it wasn’t, of a little boy in elementary school. He was staring out the window totally lost in thought. As each classmate and then the teacher noticed the room grew noticeably quiet. This brought the little boy back to present reality.

“What were you doing?” asked the teacher. “Thinking,” said the little boy. To which the teacher responded perhaps a little too quickly, “Don’t you know that you’re not supposed to think in school?” 

Is this not an important part of the well lived life? To sit and think. Ancient people had time in the evenings and perhaps mornings to sit and think. Modern life of the past two hundred or three hundred years has robbed us of that time.

Remember, even Jesus went off to be alone to sit and think and rest in God. That is a good example for us.

31 Days of Wisdom

December 31, 2024

Let’s begin the New Year with a proper state of mind and attitude.

How about 31 for 31?

January has 31 days. The book of Proverbs in the Old Testament has 31 chapters. One chapter of wisdom a day for the month of January. That should orient us for success this year. 

As a special bonus for yourself, turn to the first book of the New Testament and read Matthew chapters 5-7 as a daily companion. Matthew is firmly in that Jewish wisdom tradition. Called the Sermon on the Mount, this is most likely Jesus’s standard teaching as he traveled the countryside preaching. Ground yourself this core teaching about how to live.

I retired from active soccer refereeing about seven years ago promptly gaining some weight. I started lifting weights which added muscle—and weight. Then Covid plus moving to a new state disrupted my routines not helping. 

This year I made slight tweaks in workout and diet. Nothing drastic. Just eating less. Cutting out or reducing greatly foods that add weight (chips and sugary crap). Increasing aerobic intensity a little. Dedicating more effort to resistance training. 104 deg hot tub four days a week (great for metabolic health and longevity). I’ve dropped 21 pounds and more than an inch from my waist. Steel cut oats for more than half of my breakfasts helped drop cholesterol to the low side of good.

You don’t need drastic lifestyle changes unless you need to drop lots of weight. Small changes done consistently make all the difference (assuming no other overriding health issues).

Here are two tips for subtle changes with big impact. Ten fruits and ten foods added to your diet replacing ultra-processed and sugary foods.

Ten Fruits

  1. Blueberries
  2. Apples
  3. Oranges (not juice)
  4. Raspberries
  5. Blackberries
  6. Prunes
  7. Tomatoes
  8. Bananas
  9. Watermelon
  10. Avocados

Ten Foods

  1. Quinoa
  2. Eggs
  3. Salmon
  4. Sweet Potatoes
  5. Potatoes
  6. Blueberries
  7. Almonds
  8. Spinach
  9. Lean Chicken
  10. Oatmeal

Am I Doing My Best?

December 27, 2024

Former US President Jimmy Carter tells about interviewing with Admiral Rickover the leader of the nuclear-powered submarine fleet for a position after graduating from the US Naval Academy. Rickover asked him, “Have you always done your best?” Carter reflected and answered honestly, “No, I have to say I haven’t.”

That led to a resolution to always do his best.

Writer and venture capitalist Om Malik says (about surviving a heart attack 16 years ago), “I often ask myself: am I making the most of this additional time? Why am I wasting time on meaningless things? Today, I’ve pondered this a lot. If I’m honest, I admit I do need to make a few adjustments.”

This week as we look forward to a new year and perhaps a new start these questions are a great launching for reflecting on where we go from here.

  • Have I always done my best? Why not?
  • How can I make the most of my time this year?
  • Where am I wasting time on meaningless things?

Kind Hearts

December 26, 2024

Kind hearts are the garden,

kind thoughts are the roots,

kind words are the blossoms,

kind deeds are the fruits.

– John Ruskin

We are approaching the end of a year and the beginning of a new one. Think not of New Year’s Resolutions or goals. Or even “I resolve to be a kinder person next year.” These never succeed.

No, rather, look at yourself. What sort of person are you? What sort of person would you like to be? Perhaps write in your journal or calendar (diary) a brief description of the person you would like to be. Here is a suggestion. Write, I will be the sort of person who

Cultivates a kind heart,

Redirects thoughts and feelings intentionally toward kindness,

Pauses before speaking then speaking with kindness,

Instinctively acts toward others with kindness.

At the conclusion of the year, people will say about me, “there went a kind person.”