So instead of loving what you think is peace, love other men and love God above all. And instead of hating the people you think are warmers, hate the appetites and the disorder in your own soul, which are the causes of war. If you love peace, then hate injustice, hate tyranny, hate greed–but hate these things in yourself, not in another.
Thomas Merton, New Seeds of Contemplation
Oh, how easy it is to look at others and judge. How difficult to look within and see all the evil residing therein.
Somewhere inside we need a pause button. Like before we speak. Probably every time.
We look at someone and a story about them comes to mind. Usually not a good story. We think the worst.
Maybe if we hit that pause button and then ask a conversation starting (not ending!) question and actually listen. Maybe by listening we hear a story. Almost always that story will change the opinion. We discover people who are hurting just like us (who won’t admit it).
Maybe there is grief in the family. There are many kinds. They hurt.
Maybe they just feel left out. All they needed was someone to greet them and listen to them.
Maybe a recent diagnosis–theirs or family or friend–is weighing on them.
Maybe we pray for peace and justice, but even there we need that pause button and look inside at our attitudes towards other–maybe fear based on our own insecurities, maybe dislike merging with hatred of someone different, maybe rooting for war somewhere.
Pause and look inside. I know. I have. There’s no perfection there. Work remains to be done.
Faith Venture 
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