I’m curious about where people place their attention. Specifically, is most of our attention placed on ourselves or is most of it on other people? Or, is there a balance of the two?
Seems to me that many, if not most, people place most of the emphasis on themselves.
Many conversations seem to be about “me”. Many conversations seem to go back and forth like a tennis ball. When the ball is in my court, I talk about me. When the ball goes into your court, you talk about you. So, I wonder, is anyone listening during the exchange. Is it rare that we listen to the other?
A dominant strain of American culture teaches that it is right and good that we place most emphasis on ourselves–our desires, our situation, our opinions of others. Too much of this is unhealthy. Therefore the rise of books about the “Age of Narcissism.”
Here are some things to ponder:
- When I talk, is it mostly to proclaim what I’m doing
- When I speak of others, is it to offer judgements about them
- When others talk, I’m thinking about what I’m going to say
- I don’t seem to care about how others feel in a situation
- I don’t notice when others are upset with me
Think of the example of Jesus. He was able to turn his entire focus on a specific individual. Even when he was interrupted. And when he focused on them, he could see deeply into their souls and understand their situation. He was able to address the specific hurt or need.
His empathy did not change his core values. He could feel for each individual. But once they made a choice, it was their choice. And he went on. A perfect balance of keeping himself strong, yet focusing on others. A good model.
Faith Venture 
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